tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-41844860133235817632024-02-19T21:50:01.228+00:00The Master's VoiceAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.comBlogger27125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-30136377693860361812018-02-23T12:10:00.003+00:002018-02-23T12:10:42.819+00:00About Master Strokes - BDSM. Fetish. Bondage<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u>Let's start with my title.<o:p></o:p></u></b></div>
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There are a number who give
themselves the most fanciful of names that frankly, often, leave them hoisted
by their own petard.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I am a most grounded and level-headed man. Most Doms/Masters or
professional dominants, choose a name that embodies them. How did I select
mine? There is double-entendre behind 'Strokes' - it may mean with a whip - it
may be with the gentleness of my hand's caress.
I am far more interested in your psychology and what makes you tick than I am in satisfying
my own ego.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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<b><u>What makes me the Master that I
am?</u></b></div>
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<b><u><o:p></o:p></u></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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</div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7-8o2jeFbPtDDxDMfbA0yB4pA2eoKjbN9u8itYvHj_mbOv5jeue4GrGbIz5OgBbCSiO85Pm0OfyIIjkukesCaAuft8dA7s_Mnk6OIaBJq1lH7hB2UerByNpo3KN7c5CY6pNUbOYw7pVM/s1600/photo+4-min.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="Master Strokes BDSM Bondage" border="0" data-original-height="800" data-original-width="499" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7-8o2jeFbPtDDxDMfbA0yB4pA2eoKjbN9u8itYvHj_mbOv5jeue4GrGbIz5OgBbCSiO85Pm0OfyIIjkukesCaAuft8dA7s_Mnk6OIaBJq1lH7hB2UerByNpo3KN7c5CY6pNUbOYw7pVM/s320/photo+4-min.JPG" title="Master Strokes BDSM Bondage" width="199" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Master Strokes</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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The answer is twofold. Firstly,
the command and control: from captaining the Rugby Team as a youngster through
a public school education to joining the British Army as an Officer and more recently, in civilian life, as a Site
Manager building up to 300 homes with 120+ overgrown Neanderthals in hard hats
and steel toe boots working under me. All of this being the absolute clichéd
Testosterone Club - I have always been the Alpha Male - I instinctively have
lead and taken control ... I am a proud
Scotsman - an educated barbarian. Rule 1 in my book is that one can never treat
all the same way; everyone is individual and
unique and as such needs to have
the way in which they are treated tailored to their own motivational influences
- some are core to the individual whilst others are circumstantial to that
moment in time. Stick does most certainly have its place but care no less so!<o:p></o:p></div>
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Secondly, my regard for women:
Perhaps, as a direct result of my working life, I have an enormous appreciation
of women and anything that I regard as
epitomising femininity - from long hair to nails, make-up to stilettos ...
and that's just on a physical level. I
will also ALWAYS find a way in to your soul. Women are generally far more
sensual than men - your emotions run deeper - oft' with skills highly attuned
to disguising them as a defence mechanism - one of my main proven skills/curses
through the years has been to see through them. Female diplomacy is invariably
superior to that of most men, self included, yet my directness usually has
shock value. I see women as anything but inferior ... Simply the yin to my
yang. Ultimately - they have been my greatest fascination - the general
difference in their behaviour from that of the male psyche being far more
appealing. No less of a curiosity has been watching the struggle that they have
contended with over the years. This is one of the main reasons that I believe
BDSM has remained a taboo.</div>
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<br /></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMQHW6VUnWkwZr8u56eVp3p2Z8jumdKrrz7MsNYL01KosXOtrOfm9jvvxDy3_yb-8hSLPftjydVKdhXU5SayYZOAbXTU6oiv8uPqlkBaXjYtR5u7JUeJzgi6Cya_MiKj58gIkGKh3KNDA/s1600/photo+8-min.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="BDSM Master Strokes" border="0" data-original-height="800" data-original-width="489" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMQHW6VUnWkwZr8u56eVp3p2Z8jumdKrrz7MsNYL01KosXOtrOfm9jvvxDy3_yb-8hSLPftjydVKdhXU5SayYZOAbXTU6oiv8uPqlkBaXjYtR5u7JUeJzgi6Cya_MiKj58gIkGKh3KNDA/s320/photo+8-min.JPG" title="BDSM Master Strokes" width="195" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Master Strokes</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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For the last 100 years Society has been telling women that
they need to stand tall as equals: beginning </div>
with the likes of Emmeline
Pankhurst and the Suffragettes through to taking-on what was formerly viewed as
men's roles through the 'Great Wars', only to have them removed when the men
returned home, to having role-models ranging from Mother Theresa to Madonna,
Margaret Thatcher to the English Monarch. Yet how many have complained that
they have a partner who does not 'behave like a man' or that they have not felt
'protected and /or cared for'!? There is as much a power struggle WITHIN for
many women as there is an open struggle for equality. For as long as you have
been able to remember Society has dictated that you need to continue that
battle. Is it not indeed the stronger women that can face the world and say,
"This is not necessarily my need or at least not in all regards!"?<br />
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Indeed most of the women that I have dominated and whom have
become my BDSM submissive / slave over the years have been bright, articulate,
well educated and, in many cases highly successful in their careers; ranging from
legal professionals to high-powered business women to one of my most recent, I
have named her 'rouge', who heads-up one of the UK's most prestigious schools
of medical learning.</div>
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I come from a world of regimentation, hard and fast rules of
order, structure and discipline. Can you imagine a platoon of soldiers in
battle deciding that they would all 'do their own thing'? I have not only
'served' my nation but also a Mistress to learn a number of protocols within
the Scene many years ago. I am a great believer in the ancient Chinese proverb,
"I hear - I forget; I see - I remember; I do - I understand". Order,
reverence, humility and etiquette - all are immensely valued by Me - all will
be practiced by you!</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-63132097702990217952018-02-23T11:48:00.002+00:002018-02-23T11:48:17.584+00:00Emergence from vanilla<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: x-small;">Many thanks to: <a href="http://dominantguide.com/3208/emergence-from-vanilla-to-bdsm/">http://dominantguide.com/3208/emergence-from-vanilla-to-bdsm/</a></span></div>
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Emergence is a term sometimes used to describe the process
that many people experience when they ‘find’ either themselves or the lifestyle
of BDSM. In many cases this begins when the individual is in their late 20′s
(for some women), mid 30′s (for most men and women), to late 40′s (for
virtually everyone else). Often people become exposed to D/s after the breakup
of a long term relationship, a divorce or during a ‘mid-life crisis’. The
Internet has become one of the largest sources of D/s initiation in it’s very
short lifetime. Regardless of the actual trigger some things seem to remain
fairly consistent in a majority of the newcomer’s experiences.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Emergence is the emerging from vanilla into the BDSM lifestyle,
something like emerging from a cocoon. This is a process that takes years. It
has been my experience that there are several phases that seem to be consistent
during this emerging process. At the onset many people are uncertain ‘where’
they might fall in this new world and they may have conflicting fantasies which
in essence tell them merely that ‘things’ in this lifestyle seem to address
images, fantasies, thoughts, hopes and dreams which have lingered just below
the surface of the individual’s life sometimes for many, many years. Often if
they have discovered this lifestyle through the online rooms they find
themselves ‘pressed’ to choose an orientation. Too often the individual jumps
at what they think they might be. Choosing this role helps them fit it. They
find they can learn the lingo, talk the talk fairly quickly and be accepted.<o:p></o:p></div>
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There are several problems with an introduction into the
BDSM world in this way. One of the most significant is the case of the new
telling the new what to do. This is the blind leading the blind. The cyber BDSM
world online is composed of several different types of people. There are those
who are cyber only – and find the Internet a way to have a safe quasi-BDSM
experience interactively, with total anonymity and safety. There are those who
are not BDSM at all but what the community call vanilla kink, these tend to be
people looking for quick, easy, cheap sexual contacts and affairs with that
‘edge’ of kinky that they cannot find in their vanilla life. There are those seeking
to prey upon the new and innocent by promoting themselves as something they are
not. These can be sociopaths who enjoy injuring and even killing people, they
are beginning to use the Internet successfully as a hunting ground. Then we
have people who are real life BDSM who also enjoy making friends and contacts
on the Internet for it is truly an excellent resource and way to connect. For
an emergent or newcomer D/s person this becomes a very dangerous and tangled
web.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Sorting out what is real from what is false can require
experiences that are painful, ugly and even dangerous. People have raced to
stick ‘labels’ on people in order to classify them. This is just as flawed as
the newcomer leaping to ‘become’ something before they have any real comprehension
of what that is. An emergent Dominant may go through a phase of desiring to
submit. This is a completely honest and real feeling that can cause that
potential Dominant to mislabel themselves as a submissive or switch. An
emergent submissive may find themselves with serious combative feelings after
the commencement of a relationship with a Dominant. These combative actions can
appear very Dominant and lead that submissive into emotions of confusion and
distress. Expectations that the individual (regardless of their orientation)
can quickly ‘become’ Dominant or submissive are flawed.<o:p></o:p></div>
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The individual should consider the process one of evolution
and change. It is impossible to fully embrace either side without tasting the
other side to at least some degree. In addition since many newcomers are just
emerging from marriages they tend to have a need or desire to avoid settling
into another relationship quickly. In a new Dominant they may see this panorama
of opportunity. Willing submissives everywhere. For many new Dominant’s there
is a stage in the first 2 years of emergence where they go through a feeding
frenzy. Often taking on several submissives at once and actively resisting
efforts to commit to any one person. Some try to create stables or houses of
‘servers’. For those who translate this into a real life arena they often
discover that ‘managing’ many people is quite difficult. Not only are their
skills only marginally developed but often the people they select are newcomers
as well who have not ‘embraced’ themselves fully. In addition a vast percentage
of new Dominant’s fail to take active steps to educate themselves in the real
life BDSM world prior to assuming a Dominant role and engaging the attentions
of one or more submissives in the cyber community.<o:p></o:p></div>
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The same can be said for many submissives though in general
I find that more submissives actively educate themselves than Dominants. At
least in the beginning. Many people will make a contact and engage in a cyber
relationship which fairly quickly progresses into a real life meeting. For a
new Dominant this is a terrifying thing, they have no experience in what is
really safe or not safe, how to act, behave or respond. Some attempt to bluff
their way through by selecting a submissive who is just as much of a BDSM
virgin as they are. Again this is the blind leading the blind. This new
Dominant if they have not become active in the local community may adopt or
pattern their behavior upon what they have noted in the online cyber community
rooms. This can be absolutely disastrous as many of the role playing rituals so
common online simply do not work in real life.<o:p></o:p></div>
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A new submissive may make the same mistake. I have had
several submissives tell me they are trained – then I discover that this
training was exclusively on-line, not in real life. Please note that you can
become educated online, you can engage in private scenes that can be meaningful
and challenging for you but you cannot experience tactile reality without being
physically with another person.<o:p></o:p></div>
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It becomes especially dangerous when the submissive creates
fabrications of safety based on ‘how wonderful’ this online Dominant is. Many
feel it is unseemly to question someone too closely and can even feel that such
questioning may appear to be a lack of trust. Many newcomer submissives are
afraid to attend local events alone, fearing they will be pounced upon by
lurking Dominants. Because of this they may develop a skewed understanding of
the real life community. There are numerous safe ways to attend events and
demonstrations that do not require for either a new Dominant OR submissive to
be attached. Many real life BDSM people will voluntarily and willingly host
newcomers and invite them to attend events as part of a ‘group’ of people so
that they will feel more comfortable. Investigating these options is something
a new Dominant and submissive should actively do as soon as possible when they
recognize D/s traits inside of themselves. They should also consider joining
one of the older well established BDSM organizations and read the literature
provided by that organization.<o:p></o:p></div>
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In the 3-5 years after initial emergence the Dominant will
generally slow down from their initial frenzied state. Previous habits will
often begin to be dropped. Many of these are long term vanilla habits of
interrelating. This takes time and hard work. It requires accepting difficult
aspects of the inner self and an acknowledgment of the levels of personal
responsibility that are necessary in actively living in a BDSM relationship.
Many people in this stage will form longer term consistent relationships though
seldom will they successfully transition to a full time relationship at this
point. This is where many Dominant’s learn how to be honest, often for the
first time in their life. They tend to learn that honesty is no longer optional
but necessary. They also may begin to become intolerant of deceit,
machinations, and all kinds of underhanded antics. In the later stages of this
phase the Dominant will often begin to consider seeking out one special person
to share their life with. Some will seek two, though the success of poly
relationships are statistically much worse than mono relationships.<o:p></o:p></div>
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A submissive will endure some of the same experiences in the
3-5 year range. Often they will become quite discriminating on whom they will
interact with. Many become locally active in community organizations and
volunteer to help other newer submissives in their learning processes. A large
percentage of submissives will spend a portion of these years exploring their
Dominant side fully, either as a switch, a Top or as a full out Dominant. They
will learn to become more honest and truthful in expressing their needs both to
themselves and to others. Often they will seek to become more centered and
healthy. In the later stages of the 5-7 year period the experienced submissive
will often reach a stage of peaceful acceptance of themselves. Their desire to
be combative will have faded during the processes of removing the habits they
had developed from childhood. It is at this point that they find they can reach
out perhaps for the first time to offer themselves fully and without fear as a
true submissive.<o:p></o:p></div>
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It has been my experience that for a vast majority of people
the first contact with the BDSM community to the point of peacefully embracing
their inner self is a process that takes about 7 years. For some this is much
shorter and for some this never fully occurs. Many people DO find that they
have lived with D/s in its vanilla form for the majority of their lives and the
transition for them can occur much faster! There are no rights and wrongs to
the process itself although education will help reduce the risks and bad
experiences. There is no rush to ‘be’ anything and no right or wrong to either
orientation. In the end you will find that you will continue to change and grow
long beyond the initial stages. What is natural will eventually be the
strongest and in that you will find your true self. Try not to obsess on the
lifestyle, keep other interests and hobbies open and active. Being well rounded
is mentally healthy and allows you to make better choices.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Written by F.R.R. Mallory – also known as Mistress Steel.
This article may be excerpted from Extreme Space, The Domination and Submission
Handbook, Safe, Sane and Consensual, Dangerous Choices or other books by F.R.R.
Mallory<o:p></o:p></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-43270092306747091032016-06-27T10:00:00.000+01:002016-06-27T10:00:23.574+01:00Power play, obedience and the sense of self for the submissive<br /><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In society, we are dependent on the systems which are in
place and which sustain our lives - systems which give order to our lives. we
are conditioned and taught from an early age to be obedient to authority,
be it a teacher, police officer or judge.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">When we are faced with authority we have a tendency to yield
easier due to conditioning. we accept we are part of a hierarchy and obedience
is present within our social structures.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p> </o:p><span style="text-align: center;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Throughout time, obedience and power plays have existed.
Take the example of a soldier who has surrendered to the governing authority
who partakes in certain actions, ( which they may not have taken alone ) - when
questioned as to why they carried out certain tasks, the reply will be; "I
was ordered to".</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">By submitting to authority there is a sense of liberation, a
freeing from responsibility. the culpability lies with the one in authority.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Looking at My submissives, I often see the same euphoric
liberation. Those who come to me as submissives do not do so because they are
weak, lack self worth or have low self esteem. on the contrary, they are usually,
if not always, competitive, assertive, confident and power hungry in their
everyday lives.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">They submit because it is invigorating, freeing and
liberating. Submitting makes them feel unchained from the consequences of their
actions - engaging in behaviour which would normally be unthinkable when acting
alone within their 'vanilla' lives becomes excusable and justifiable when
acting under orders.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Submission in BDSM is intoxicatingly blinding - with
obedience comes exhilarating freedom from consequences. Obedience to the
authority is determined within a scene by the legitimacy of the authority
figure. Mistresses are aided in this legitimacy with the aid of 'the scene'
itself - whips, chains, collars, dungeon equipment and the Mistress /
Dominatrix 'uniform'. The visual perception supports the submissives sense of
helplessness, to yield to controlling authority. This perception of the
authority figure increases the submissives feeling of dependency and asserts
the power of the Mistress over them.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Before the start of a session, I will meet and greet My
submissives outside of the 'play' area. At this very moment, we are two
ordinary people - power and authority are irrelevant. As soon as a sessions
begins and the submissive enters the 'play' area, there is a shift in
perception. Aided by the aura and contents of the dungeon, the psychological
effect on the submissive is rapid and intense. there is a clear behavioural
change in the submissive - a nervousness, an eagerness to please and a
desperation to maintain my favour.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The longer a session or the more sessions a submissive
attends, there develops a level of habituation - they become compliant
and familiar to their role as a submissive. feelings of hopelessness and being
controlled become natural and accepted. the submissive feels freed from decision
making process and the responsibility of the consequences. They are free to act
and partake in activities they would never normally participate in.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Post session discussions are essential. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The impact of 'power play' can overpoweringly
impact a submissives sense of self (sub-drop). At its most basic component, sub
drop is the conflict between the sense of self and what a person feels they
ought to be. (Our ideal self is the person we want to be. Our ought self is our
understanding of what others want us to be - what we ought to be and do.) Sub
drop happens when the submissive faces a cognitive dissonance (the excessive
mental stress and discomfort experienced by an individual who holds two or more
contradictory beliefs, ideas, or values at the same time or is confronted by
new information that conflicts with existing beliefs, ideas, or values ) over
their actions and experiences during the session. A negative reaction is when
the submissive faces the fact that they willingly participated in something
they would not normally have participated in, that they allowed themselves to
be degraded, humiliated, bound, restrained and tortured - events which are
conflicting with their sense of self. Their sense of self is challenged when it
doesn't match up with who they think they ought to be. this can be very depressing
and frightening. It is essential to allow the submissive to re integrate
within their self and break the phase of role play- and this is best done post
session.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Discussing the session, the activities, the role play allows
both parties to break the scene and share feelings, desires sand once again
become two ordinary people.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><table border="0" cellpadding="0" style="table-layout: fixed; width: 450px;">
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<span style="color: rgb(33 , 33 , 33); display: inline; font-weight: bold;">Master Strokes</span>
<span style="display: inline;">/</span> <span style="color: rgb(33 , 33 , 33); display: inline;">Pro BDSM & Lifestyle Dom</span>
<span style="display: inline;"><br /></span>
<a href="mailto:master-strokes@live.co.uk" style="color: rgb(221 , 17 , 17); display: inline; text-decoration: none;">master-strokes@live.co.uk</a><span style="display: inline;"> / </span><span style="color: rgb(33 , 33 , 33); display: inline;">0743 22 22 347</span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-3345727920306332362016-06-24T15:36:00.000+01:002016-06-24T15:36:10.843+01:00HUMOUR: THINGS A #SUBMISSIVE SHOULD NEVER DO<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>1. Pushing limits does not mean making Master so angry that
the vein above His right eye throbs.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>2. "Quit it!" "OW, Damnit!" "I’m
hiding that toy when You go to work tomorrow" and cursing a blue streak
are not safe words.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>3. "Oh my God, where did you get those. They are
gorgeous!!!" is not considered boot worship.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>4. "Ya want fries with that?" "Want me to
drink it for You too?" are not appropriate remarks when Master gives you
an elaborate drink order.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>5. Flipping your Master off while your hands are cuffed
behind your back is a bad idea. Owners have a way of knowing these things.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>6. Putting lube, goop, superglue, ink or any other substance
that will sully the ________ of Master on His toys while setting up for a
session is not a good idea.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>7. Kicking the toy you hate far under the bed is futile.
Master will only secure your wrist cuffs to your ankle cuffs and make you crawl
for it....repeatedly.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>8. "Bite me." is NEVER an intelligent response to
a command.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i></i></span></div>
<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>9. Doing your Beavis and Butthead imitation of "Fire,
fire, fire, fire!" during Master's lecture on fire play safety is
considered rude.</i></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>10. Responding with "Yes, All Wise, All Knowing, Grand
Imperial Weenie" is not appropriate when Master asks you if you are
comfortable during a bondage scene.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>11. Asking to go to the bathroom every five minutes while
Master practices His Japanese rope work on you will try His patience
....quickly.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>12. Crossing your eyes and sticking your tongue out while Master
is discussing your punishment is not wise.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>13. There is no such thing as slave immunity, fee slave day,
or the PMS defense. The slave jury might not convict you, but the Dom judge
will override the verdict. Count on it!</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>14. Pretending Master's collection of butt plugs are toys
and singing the "Weebles Wobble but the won't fall down" song is not
a good idea.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>15. Repeatedly blowing out each candle Master lights during
wax play will get you punished.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>16. Checking Master's head for the 666 symbol after a harsh
punishment will only get you more of the same....or worse!</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>17. "i know You are but what am i?" is not the
appropriate response when called a "raunchy little whore" during
humiliation play.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>18. Using spreader bars, paddles, or canes for the fireplace
is not a good plan.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>19. "Missed me missed me now ya gotta kiss me!" is
an unacceptable remark when Master's flogger slips.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>20. When Master pulls out his bullwhip and says He wants to
play, He doesn't mean hide-&-seek...He WILL find you eventually.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>21. Calling Merry Maids when you are ordered to spruce up
the place is not what your Master had in mind.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>22. "Faster faster we need a new Master" is NOT
the song to sing during a scene.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>23. "Oh and You think i am?" is an unacceptable
response to hearing your Master say He is not pleased.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>24. During a play party is not the time to do your hilarious
imitation of Igor and hunch over, moaning "Yes Master" when ordered
to fetch something.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>25. Adding "Sir" or "Master" to
"Fuck that!" will not save you.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>26. Singing the chorus of "Anything You Can Do I Can Do
Better" under your breath during a session is considered foolhardy.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>27. Reciting nursery rhymes during an interrogation scene to
crack your Master up only lasts for so long. Then you will pay....BIG!</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>28. Arguing whether "Master may not be right, but
Master is never wrong" is Zen or Buddhist philosophy will only get you
rewarded with kneeling in the corner of a bed of Lego's "to help you
consider the question in quiet contemplation."</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>29. Asking "Is that as HARD as you can hit???" is
considered a cry for help among submissive suicide prevention workers!</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>30. Reminding Master you are a switch will not get you out
of trouble for ordering Him around.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>31. Rolling your eyes when Sir gives you "That
look" is not a good idea.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>and last but least....</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>32. Even if you are fast enough to close the other bracelet
of the cuffs around his wrist while he's closing the first one on yours, you
probably shouldn't. "</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">COURTESY OF: – TGITrouble</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Courtesy of: TGITrouble's Writing 28F brat (Bakersfield,
California) </span></div>
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<img alt="" border="0" height="80" src="https://htmlsigs.s3.amazonaws.com/logos/files/000/580/094/landscape/sensual-bondage-oleksiy-maksymenko.jpg" width="107" />
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<td align="left" nowrap="nowrap" width="343"><div style="font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 14px; margin-bottom: 10px;">
<span style="color: red;"><span style="display: inline; font-weight: bold;">Master Strokes</span>
<span style="display: inline;">/</span></span> <span style="color: rgb(33 , 33 , 33); display: inline;">Pro BDSM & Lifestyle Dom</span>
<span style="color: #212121; display: inline;"><br /></span>
<a href="mailto:master-strokes@live.co.uk" style="display: inline; text-decoration: none;">master-strokes@live.co.uk</a><span style="display: inline;"> / </span><span style="display: inline;">0743 22 22 347</span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-19529009439100414502016-06-24T15:17:00.001+01:002016-06-24T15:17:02.434+01:00#BDSM as a way to abuse.<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUP7JxnM5QvJSyys_zM5Jnd3KsJlQvnlysKOU2hRA0ZO5HzccaWmIia_cGwMRGcqi75x103WLHX6k0v0oCTipaU5OjhS0M0kpOL7YN26w6xRxNMSDuAz0Czkt40pqNzyEUufCEMAlpndA/s1600/ABUSE.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUP7JxnM5QvJSyys_zM5Jnd3KsJlQvnlysKOU2hRA0ZO5HzccaWmIia_cGwMRGcqi75x103WLHX6k0v0oCTipaU5OjhS0M0kpOL7YN26w6xRxNMSDuAz0Czkt40pqNzyEUufCEMAlpndA/s320/ABUSE.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Within this lifestyle there are unfortunately many
dangers, there are people out there using the BDSM lifestyle as a way to abuse
or use individuals under an umbrella of acceptance. Within each situation there
are warning signs that we see, unfortunately sometimes we do not see these warning
signs until it is too late. There are many people that say they are a Dominant
are not, instead they are users, abusers, predators, wannabees, bullies, and
manipulators. This article is designed to help people understand what a warning
sign or red flag is, and hopefully prevent someone from getting hurt.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Some people think that just because they have read all the
books and watched all the movies that they are instant Dominants; Instant
Dominant…Just Add Water, and Shake Well. Just because he or she has a few
floggers doesn't mean they know how to use them or that they are a Dominant of
any form. Just because someone orders you around or attempts to control your
life doesn't mean they are a Dominant. Being a Dominant is a menagerie of
infinite strengths and weaknesses combined together with all the normal human
mediocrities. It takes a lifetime of learning and growing to be a Dominant, and
those that believe otherwise may not have a true grasp of the concept. Even as
one is able to claim the title of Dominant, Master, Mistress, Lord, or Lady,
God or Goddess, one is still learning, the learning is a never ending road that
allows us to travel into the exciting and new dimensions of this adventure
called BDSM.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">As a Dominant myself I have come to understand that every
Dominant does things in a different manner, and that just because what they do
is different from what I do, it doesn't make what they do wrong, it just makes
it different. However there is a difference between just being different and
being dangerous.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If someone submits to you because they fear you, then you
are a bully not a Dominant.</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> If someone submits to you because you give him or
her expensive presents then you are a pimp not a Dominant.</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> If someone submits to you because you threaten to
leave or abandon him or her if they refuse then you are a manipulator, not a
Dominant.</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> If someone submits to you because you wont leave
him or her alone if they don\'t then you are a predator not a Dominant.</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> If someone submits to you because you will beat him
or her if they don\'t then you are an abuser not a Dominant.</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">There are far too many individuals out there in today\'s
society that manipulate, abuse, use, and lie to others in an effort to gain
their service and respect."</span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-65490797318565900932015-11-04T09:52:00.000+00:002015-11-04T09:52:00.107+00:00Staying safe on the first meeting<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>For a first contact
the following guidelines are what many experienced people involved in epe/bdsm
suggest. Most are common sense - but that's exactly the first thing some people
seem to lose when they're about to begin an erotic power exchange encounter.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> If you respond to a personal ad, try writing
or phoning a couple of times first and use a post office box when
corresponding. You don't want strange people ringing your doorbell
unexpectedly.</span></blockquote>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> When you intend to meet somebody in person
who you've met on the Net or through a personal ad, phone chat box or dateline,
make sure you know something verifiable about him or her.</span></blockquote>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span></o:p></div>
<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> The first time you actually meet, make an
appointment in a public place like a restaurant - and NOT at either one of your
homes.</span></blockquote>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> Regardless of where you meet, be sure to get
pertinent information from him or her first: full name, address, phone number,
(if in the US) social security number and driver's license number. If this
sounds a bit drastic to your potential partner, s/he should understand that you
do trust them and hope they trust you enough to provide this information. You
can't be too careful - even if you think s/he is the most wonderful person on
earth, your safety should be uppermost in your mind.</span></blockquote>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> Once you have this information, give it to a
trusted friend (preferably someone who is aware of your lifestyle) as well as
where you'll be meeting and when you can be expected to return. This isn't, as
we've said, to scare anyone away from meeting someone met through the Internet
or other "blind" services. It's so you can protect yourself from any
problems which may (or may not) occur. You might want to rethink meeting
someone who isn't willing to respect your desire to protect yourself by giving
you this information upfront. By the way, be prepared that the one you're
meeting may ask you the same questions.</span></blockquote>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> There are quite a few horror stories around
on the Internet about first meetings, usually in the United States. Most are
just tall tales but the ones that are true are almost always the result of bad
preparation and disregarding obvious warning signals. But this is not
"just" true for the United States, it happens in Europe just as well
albeit - as a result of the smaller scale of things - less frequently. Most
likely in Europe you'll be the victim of a joke and nobody turns up on your
first date. That stinks, but at least you're in no danger. Especially for the
USA it isn't such a bad idea to set up a safety network for first meetings,
i.e. have one or two trusted friends call you at the place where you are during
your first meeting to make sure you're okay.</span></blockquote>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> We cannot over-emphasize the importance of
using your common sense. Although 99,9% of the people involved in erotic power
exchange are perfectly normal people, especially the Internet has made it quite
easy for people with not so good intentions to find their way into the
community. If you smell a rat, don't proceed. When in doubt, ask others and
follow their opinion. They - the bystanders - are usually right.</span></blockquote>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> The general advice is not to start active
play the first time(s) you meet, but spend time talking and getting to know
each other.</span></blockquote>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> Blind erotic power exchange dates are
intriguing but very risky.</span></blockquote>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> Incidental contacts - on a party or group
meeting - may be risky as well. Within a BDSM group you are usually safer
because somebody will probably know the person you want to date, so you can ask
around first. Don't hesitate to ask. BDSM people are used to these situations
and will be happy to be of assistance.</span></blockquote>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> If you have no chance to ask, observe before
you go into anything.</span></blockquote>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> And, if you're planning to take part in
active play at a party or group meeting, always make sure there's a dungeon
master around.</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Many thanks to: <a href="http://www.fetishexchange.org/safety08.shtml">Fetish exchange</a> </span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-44967696288913323022015-11-02T09:00:00.000+00:002015-11-02T09:00:01.505+00:00Written tasks for a #submissive<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>What is a Task or assignment?<o:p></o:p></u></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOW0dvS4i_xRysy11S1vw9zSNDqrzHkVK5E6f7HpRXEBmweL4_TgpyL11GnHOSDW6ELlmXqSxVeGMIUD1bY0Z5Dc5ec4z6jpjbq7ipOH7JDh8866kMrizUULDW5ARcjM8QQWUmtFg60qc/s1600/submissive+tasks.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOW0dvS4i_xRysy11S1vw9zSNDqrzHkVK5E6f7HpRXEBmweL4_TgpyL11GnHOSDW6ELlmXqSxVeGMIUD1bY0Z5Dc5ec4z6jpjbq7ipOH7JDh8866kMrizUULDW5ARcjM8QQWUmtFg60qc/s1600/submissive+tasks.jpg" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Tasks or assignments should always have a purpose - to help
improve a submissive in a particular way. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This list of six general purposes of a given assignments
posted by <a href="http://xcbdsm.com/educational-offerings/handouts-and-resources/assignments/" target="_blank">|X|C|BDSM|</a>, originally taken from a handout at Beyond Leather
in Ft. Lauderdale, FL in April of 2013. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">For their Growth / Education<o:p></o:p></span></u></b></div>
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<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></u></b></div>
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</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Reading List</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Cultural Exposure,
such as going to a play or museum</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Doing something
creative, like writing a story or drawing a picture</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Taking a class or
learning a new skill</span></li>
</ul>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span></div>
<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">For your pleasure / benefit (Service Assignments)<o:p></o:p></span></u></b></div>
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<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></u></b></div>
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</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Chores / errands</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Purchase a type of
clothing the dominant likes</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Embarrassing or
frustrating tasks that the dominant enjoys</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Four Types of
Service Assignments</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Service that makes
you (the dominant) feel good</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Service that makes
you look good</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Service that
unburdens you</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Service to
your goals and ambitions</span></li>
</ul>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Conditioning / training<o:p></o:p></span></u></b></div>
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<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></u></b></div>
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</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Practising service
tasks</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Daily Focus
(Posture, presentation, mindfulness, etc)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Learning and
remembering preferences</span></li>
</ul>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">To gain information / insight about them<o:p></o:p></span></u></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Journalling</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Porn / Fiction – An
assignment I often give where the submissive is told to collect fictional D/s
stories that arouse them and tell me what they like about each.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Questionnaires –
such as a BDSM checklist or the Myers-Briggs assessment.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Essays – Such as
“300 words on what the word ‘slave’ means to you”</span></li>
</ul>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></u></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Keep them busy / maintain dynamic and structure<o:p></o:p></span></u></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></u></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Chores / errands</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Scavenger Hunt</span></li>
</ul>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Personal Care<o:p></o:p></span></u></b></div>
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<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></u></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Exercise</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Diet</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Grooming</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Breaks / Vacation</span></li>
</ul>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>Examples of good daily tasks: </u><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></u></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A few great ones are listed above such as journaling,
practicing posture or positions, sticking to a diet, exercising or purchasing a
piece of clothing your Top has requested. Here are some more ideas:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Daily Check-Ins </b>(Specific Times by text, email, phone, etc)</span></li>
<li><b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Maintaining respect when addressing the Top.</span></b></li>
<li><b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wearing a collar at specific times or 24/7</span></b></li>
<li><b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Completing a submissive/slave workbook/worksheets or written
assignments.</span></b></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Asking for preference regarding clothing or wearing what the
Top chooses for the bottom</b>. (wear only heels, go commando for two hours during
the day, specific lingerie, etc)</span></li>
<li><b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Meditation or Yoga</span></b></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Self-care </b>(time for you, counseling, trip to the spa, out
with friends, etc)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Specific Bedtime and/or Wake Up Time</b> (Must in bed by
midnight and awake no later than 7 am)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Researching a specific BDSM aspect or activity</b> - completing
an assignment on research (journal x number of pages, practice, oral report,
etc)</span></li>
<li><b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Reading X amount of pages in a book</span></b></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Financial Responsibility</b>: Given an allowance, In charge of
budget,Pay bills</span></li>
<li><b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Permission to orgasm/masturbate/initiate play or follow
specific instructions when doing so.</span></b></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Chores:</b> Laundry, Lawn
Care, Daily Cleaning, House Repair</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Service Tasks:</b> Preparing a Meal, Specific serving
instructions (kneeling, in the nude, as human furniture, etc), Preparing daily
drinks (i.e.; coffee/tea in the AM, alcoholic beverage in the PM), Taking care
of children, Organizing important dates and functions (meetings, doctor’s
appointments, birthdays, etc), Preparing a Meal,Specific serving instructions
(kneeling, in the nude, as human furniture, etc), Preparing daily drinks (i.e.;
coffee/tea in the AM, alcoholic beverage in the PM), Taking care of children, Organizing
important dates and functions (meetings, doctor’s appointments, birthdays, etc)</span></li>
</ul>
<br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-87970102506440444002015-10-24T16:56:00.001+01:002015-10-24T16:56:26.336+01:00An Actual Submissive on What 'Fifty Shades of Grey' Got WrongMANY THANKS TO: <b><u>JEN DOLL - <a href="http://www.thewire.com/entertainment/2012/09/actual-submissive-what-fifty-shades-grey-got-wrong/56463/">THE WIRE</a></u></b><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoxMU6jrULTOPOIXc6pW-KoLJ6FbjY6Uw_sCNSxz4RVBSavh2WMEFfMAvq-FlBDfvdS-PYwWyoKMoYMNAYVdD653GFcyP4afRcQgOqHCSU3yVtrZKAnPUOQ6Py5H5peGtrQDIGqk0C_Q4/s1600/50+SHADES.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="161" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoxMU6jrULTOPOIXc6pW-KoLJ6FbjY6Uw_sCNSxz4RVBSavh2WMEFfMAvq-FlBDfvdS-PYwWyoKMoYMNAYVdD653GFcyP4afRcQgOqHCSU3yVtrZKAnPUOQ6Py5H5peGtrQDIGqk0C_Q4/s320/50+SHADES.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Since its release in the United
States, that initially self-published little trilogy called Fifty Shades of
Grey has sold more than 30 million copies. It's dominated the best-seller lists
all summer. (Just today came the news that it had been bumped by Gillian
Flynn's Gone Girl in e-book sales. Don't worry,Fifty Shades still has an
overall lock on things.) But with popularity, and/or hype, comes plenty of
reaction, including our own here at The Atlantic Wire. Along with all the
opinions, there have been numerous books with similar themes, similar covers, similar
plots. There have been purposeful parodies and the cases of mistaken identity,
books that have gotten a sales pick-me-up based on Shades without ever meaning
to. There have been a spate of articles attempting to codify what this all
means for women. Now, there's the true-life memoir, Diary of a Submissive, out
today from Penguin, by the pseudonymou Sophie Morgan. The book is being called
"the 'real' Fifty Shades of Grey": "a memoir that offers the
real story of what it means to be a submissive, following Sophie's story as she
progresses from her early erotic experiences through to experimenting with her
newfound, awakened sexuality." It's certainly not the only true-life tale
of BDSM, but it's a comparison the rare publisher could resist given the market.
After all, Random House has reportedly seen a 20 percent increase in revenue
with the trilogy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But what does it mean to have
written the "real" Fifty Shades? We spoke to Sophie Morgan, about the
inevitable Fifty Shades comparisons and criticisms, and what she hopes to
accomplish with Diary of a Submissive.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>Jen Doll: You've read Fifty Shades
of Grey, of course. What do you think about it? <o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sophie Morgan: I think any book
that encourages women to be open about their fantasies and experiment sexually
should definitely be welcomed. The book itself is pure escapism, as much about
the opulent gifts and squillionaire lifestyle as it is about the kinky sex, a
Mills and Boon with lots more spanking (yes, Mills and Boon does spanking
nowadays too). It's a great thing. The disappointment comes that despite
millions of people now knowing about safe words and jiggle balls, is that it
hasn't done much to improve how people perceive BDSM sex, and in many ways has
cemented a lot of misconceptions.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>How does being "a
submissive" fit into the overall category of "BDSM"?<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Dominance and submission is just
one part of BDSM. It encompasses a wider spectrum including bondage,
discipline, sadism, and masochism as well. Generally for me the terminology is
interchangeable, but some people might identify more closely with one aspect or
another.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>What does Fifty Shades get wrong?<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The problem is that the dynamic of
the relationship between dominant Christian and submissive Ana, even allowing
for the caveats of it being fictional and somewhat based on the Edward/Bella
Twilight romance, is nothing like any relationship I've had with a dominant.
And while I'm not doing surveys of every kinkster I meet, I'd argue it's very
different to most relationships based on this kind of power play. The kind of
high-handedness that Christian shows is actually more a sign of a potentially
abusive relationship that most women would and should run for the hills to
avoid than signs he's her Prince Charming—helipad and penthouse apartment or
not.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bits of it are definitely
realistic (although I maintain the sex contract is filler and about as sexy as
Sheldon Cooper's Roommate Agreement, despite people disagreeing with me on
Twitter about it), and the characters are interesting enough that even at my
grumpiest I still wanted to find out what happened to them, but overall I was a
bit disappointed. That said, I'm aware I'm in the minority and my view is just
one out of millions who did enjoy it. To each their own!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>How did you end up writing your
book? Why do you think it's valuable to present your story as a memoir?<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Initially I started by writing a
now defunct blog. It wasn't really for anyone other than me. I wasn't promoting
it or looking for people to read it, but I found writing about what I was
experiencing sexually after I'd tried new things was fun, and also helped me
get to grips with what had just happened. Particularly early on, my mind took a
little while to catch up with my body (for example, in the moment I'd be
thinking 'why the hell am I letting him do THIS?' even while my body's
reactions were showing that I was really into it), and it was something that
surprised me a lot, and I found it interesting and cathartic to write about
afterwards.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I think my story is interesting as
another viewpoint on BDSM, one perhaps more realistic of people who indulge in
dominant/submissive [relationships] as part of their lives but aren't in a 24/7
lifestyle type scenario. When I first started reading erotica I read lots of
hot things but nothing that really encapsulated my life, where BDSM is part of
the whole but not the whole thing, and where my lovelife and relationships fit
together around it rather than being utterly consumed by it. I think the
realism makes it interesting.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>Who are you?<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sophie Morgan is a pseudonym. I'm
33 and a full-time working journalist at a newspaper in England.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>What do you want in a
relationship? <o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Ultimately what I want in a
relationship is the same as everyone else. I want someone to love me, make me
laugh, enjoy doing the same kind of fun things I do, care about a lot of the
same things I care about, put up with my foibles, spend my life with. I just
also want them to hurt and humiliate me sometimes in consensual, hot ways. And
occasionally do the washing up.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>Is the book completely true?<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The timeline and a few
people/experiences have been amalgamated together both to ensure that they're
not identifiable and to make the narrative structure of the book flow
better—I'm not sure anyone's life could fit the template of a book without a
little bit of juggling. But the emotional responses and reactions in the
situations are all true and honest. Even the post-break up baking, much to my
shame.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>What do you think people don't
understand about the power dynamic you describe? <o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">There's a few things. I think the
main misconception is that somehow submissives (and indeed dominants) are
somehow broken. This is most definitely not true—there's no trauma in my
childhood, no psychological issues that mean I enjoy what I enjoy sexually. I
just do, in the same way I fancy Damian Lewis and people in geeky glasses.
Another assumption is that submissives are submissive to everyone—that they're
meek, woolly headed doormats. No submissive I've met has ever been like that,
the fact is the power we give away is earned, it doesn't go to just anyone.
Also, the fact is that even when we submit fundamentally the power of the
dynamic remains with us. We can choose whether to stop—whether that's to stop
what's happening in a particular sexual scenario, or to stop a relationship
we're unhappy with.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>In the book you mention that
you're a feminist. How, would you say, can a person be a feminist and also a
submissive? <o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Despite what I like to do in bed I
consider myself a feminist and find it very depressing that because of my
informed sexual choices there are women who'd want to wave "down with this
sort of thing" placards in my direction. Don't get me wrong, I understand
that what I enjoy is, in a different context which is the key, potentially
another woman's worst nightmare. It's not something everyone might indulge in,
but should I wish to, within safe, sane and consensual circumstances and in
privacy with my trusted partner, I'm very uncomfortable with anyone telling me
I can't or I shouldn't. The sexual aspect of my relationship is completely
separate from other aspects of it. I am in control of my finances, my
reproductive health, my career, my social life and all the other things that
feminism has fought for. I genuinely believe it's the fundamental
misunderstanding of what BDSM is that contributes a lot to feminists'
opposition to Dominant/submissive relationships, and this misunderstanding is
perpetuated in epic fashion by Fifty Shades of Grey.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>What would you say to accusations
that you're trying to capitalize on the popularity of Fifty Shades?<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">With the explosion of discussion
around Fifty Shades of Grey, I can understand why some people might assume that
I am jumping on the bandwagon with Diary of a Submissive. What I'd like to
point out is that I'm not doing that, so much as running alongside the
bandwagon, waving my arms and shouting “let me show you what BDSM is really
like, sexually and romantically, and what I get out of it. And no, my boyfriend
doesn't have a red room of pain...”</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-85561062556106249602015-10-21T09:06:00.000+01:002015-10-21T09:06:00.215+01:00Sensuous Caning. SETUP, WARM-UP TECHNIQUE. #SensualCaning<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Author: Conrad Hodson</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">© 1997, 1998</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>INTRODUCTION</u></b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2ESbNoI1a7KZ1-4kYC0cv8gKc-o8VHbdJOMl0n6G6REIETfbNh3Rj-3QDtUGxUxnOKw3f8w-L6802d-tBGdNPokEl35V5ekCMSFRFx46ur3xmmM-FfprOHNbDYCr7Pja0XnllXqTS3lE/s1600/242441-250.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2ESbNoI1a7KZ1-4kYC0cv8gKc-o8VHbdJOMl0n6G6REIETfbNh3Rj-3QDtUGxUxnOKw3f8w-L6802d-tBGdNPokEl35V5ekCMSFRFx46ur3xmmM-FfprOHNbDYCr7Pja0XnllXqTS3lE/s400/242441-250.jpg" width="326" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Canes have a deserved reputation as The Victorian Terror
Weapon. To most submissives, they mean
severe punishment; to sensation-seeking S/M bottoms, overload. If we have care and patience, however, canes
can be used in a loving and sensuous way.
The very stiffness of a good cane, that makes a hard stroke so intense,
allows the lightest taps to be given with perfect control. And a light canestroke is easy to aim, unlike
a flexible whip that sags and flops at low power. In the kind of sensuous play I'm describing
here, light strokes are far more prevalent and important than heavy ones.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This style is a matter of trust, patience, and finesse. If you can't gain, maintain, and deserve the
bottom's trust, the whole thing is probably going to fail, or fall far short of
what it could be. As for patience, don't
even start a scene like this unless you have at least an hour available, and
two is better. Finesse? Well, on two occasions bottoms have gone to
sleep while I was caning them. They woke
up black and blue, and giggling. That's
finesse.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I'm not bragging, and I'm not saying I'm some kind of Caning
God. It's learnable. That's why I'm writing this.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>CANING TECHNIQUE<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A single cane can deliver an entire symphony of
sensation. A snappy blow that is pulled
back a bit just before impact will emphasize surface sting. The same sort of
blow carried past the moment of impact, with follow-through, will have much
more thud and penetration.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The greatest intensity is delivered by the outer third or so
of the cane's length. This is the
portion that leaves marks, in a hard blow.
In a light blow, this part of the cane will have a relatively stingy
feel. Closer to the top's hand, the cane moves much more slowly, and the
sensation will be more thuddy or even massage-like. This allows a good way of maintaining rhythm
and atmosphere while giving some relief to a bottom who is showing signs of
overload.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The very tip of a cane can be used on many targets that a
full-length blow might harm, or be unable to even reach. Tip shots can work the inside of the sweet
spot, the bottoms of the feet, the muscles between the spine and the shoulder
blades. A traditional cane stroke in any
of these areas would cross bony areas, causing bone bruises and pain that is
not at all erotic; a hard one might chip bones or crush nerves, and cause truly
harmful damage. DON'T try for these with
any force until you are utterly sure of your aim! Lighter tip shots are much safer, and feel
much like percussion massage.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>SETUP<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I prefer to have the bottom lying flat. When a person goes as deeply into bottom
space as I hope to send them, the mere act of keeping their balance will be a
distraction. Having them lie on a table
is easiest on the top's back in these long scenes; massage tables are ideal,
and cafeteria-type tables are sturdy and about the right height. Arrange padding if the table doesn't already
have it; I usually bring a single-bed sheet and a roll of foam to parties and
demos.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Second choice is ground level; on a mattress or futon, or
the foam pad. Here the bottom will be laying prone and the top will sit or
kneel beside them. On table or floor,
it's nice to have three or four feet clear on either side of the bottom, so
that you can switch sides. Since the tip
of the cane always hits the hardest, switching sides will help to keep the
caning symmetrical. Also, it allows the
top's other hand to rove over a different part of the bottom's body. From one side, you can stroke,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">massage, caress, and collect feedback from feet, legs, and
buttocks, and play with their crotch if it's that kind of scene. From the other, you caress their face,
massage their back, grab hair or the back of their neck, play trust games with
your finger between their teeth as you cane them...<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A caning can be an awkward thing to deliver when the bottom
is standing, especially if the top is taller.
There is a strong tendency for strokes to land too high, on the bony
upper half of the butt, when the bottom is standing up. Also, the sweet spot is hard to reach from
this position. Going to one knee may help.
Occasionally a play space may have a stage or platform of some kind,
with bondage facilities near the edge of it.
If you have the gear and knowhow to do it safely, suspension may also
offer a way to get the bottom a foot or two higher.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I try to avoid the traditional bent positions for caning,
where the recipient crouches or bends over a chair. For one thing, this stretched skin is much
more sensitive. Victorian punishers
wanted overload; for a sensuous caning we want to avoid it. For another, the tailbone comes up into
harm's way when one bends over, and a hard canestroke is quite capable of
chipping it and inflicting a painful lifetime disability. Damaged tailbones
don't heal! There is a lot of perfectly
good buttock area that is hard to work safely from these positions; when the
bottom's body is straight, much more of the tailbone is protected. When in doubt, run your finger down the
spine, all the way into the crack of their ass; you can feel how far the
tailbone goes. Check this each time; the
length varies surprisingly among different people.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>WARM-UP TECHNIQUE<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The best precondition for a trip to Endorphin Heaven is for
the bottom to be deeply relaxed, trusting, not anticipating the next stroke but
rather accepting. Going too hard or too
fast will drop them out of their bottom space (that warm, accepting state of
trust) at just the time when you should be building it up. Their hindbrain will take charge, and its
ancient survival reflexes will start screaming "We're taking damage! Get
us the hell out of here!" A good
bottom wants the scene to go well, and will be working to control panic and
nervousness. For this particular style
of scene, the top must build the intensity so smoothly that the bottom is
supported rather than challenged in their efforts to stay cantered and
accepting.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Of course, some people warm up much faster than others. "Smooth" is one thing; boring is
quite another. In initial negotiations,
I mention this, and if we are using the "traffic light" safe words I
point out that "green" is also a colour, and that they can always
call for a speedup if they want one.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">As we begin, I like to promise that I will escalate the
intensity very gradually - something like "no stroke will be more than a
third harder than I've already given you".
This helps them relax. You need
to keep this promise, too; surprises will tense them up for a long while
afterwards. Resist the temptation to
tease them or fake them out, for the same reason.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I often begin with an ordinary massage. I explore the muscles of the back, buttocks,
and legs, checking for tense spots and taking whatever time is needed to relax
them and establish an expectation of pleasure from my touch. Massage is itself an endorphin releaser, and
very non-threatening. When a bottom is
new to this technique, their delighted surprise can relax them, build a lot of
trust early on, and give them confidence that there are rewards to be had in
exploring with you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">After achieving relaxation of any tense spots, do a little
fingertip percussion on the muscled areas of the bottom's body. (Fingertip percussion is what a pianist does
to strike several close keys all at once.)
The fingers of one or both hands are crooked, and struck down in to the
target area. Work the upper back, to
either side of the spine, this way for a while.
Do the same to the lower part of the buttocks, and down the backs of the
legs. This sort of sensation is a
perfect bridge between massage and flagellation; it's especially good for
introducing beginners.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Now begin with the cane, tapping very lightly over the areas
that had the percussion warm-up. Don't
tap any bony areas; this is a good time to develop the habit of avoiding
them. Use the cane tip to reach areas
that have bone close alongside. The
blows should have less force than your fingertips did; the cane is hard and
stingy, and the idea is to introduce the cane without breaking the relaxed and
trusting glow of your warm-up.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Along with ordinary light taps, mix in a few that are
feather-light; with practice you can deliver a flutter as light as the landing
of a flock of butterflies. This is a
wonderful contrast to harder strokes; as endorphins build up such a light
flutter will often bring on a fit of giggles.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">As you work, do single taps, double taps, quick flutters of
various intensities. Your goal here is
twofold. You are trying to teach the
bottom that they cannot predict your strokes, but that it doesn't matter
because they won't be harmed. It is a
non-verbal trust-building exercise..
Done with care, you can give the bottom that wonderful open acceptance
of whatever happens, the key to the very best bottom space.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Another key to good bottom space is breathing. Deep, careful breathing controls panic, and
this is vital as intensity builds. Panic
is really the unpleasant portion of pain; take panic away and what's left is
just strong sensations. All kinds of
wonderful things can be done with strong sensations...<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If your bottom has ever done yoga, meditation, natural
childbirth training, or anything like that, remind them that deep, slow
breathing is important here, too. If
they have never had such training, coach them as you go. If their breathing becomes short and choppy,
ease up and remind them to relax and breathe deeply (unless they're coming, of
course; that's to be encouraged, not interrupted with good advice!)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If your other hand keeps up a steady contact with caresses
and massage, not only will it relax and comfort the bottom but you will be able
to detect twitches, tension, or relaxation.
Especially with bottoms who aren't very verbal or vocal, this is the
best feedback you can have.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If they are vocalizing, watch out for a sharp edge to their
tone. It warns of gradually building
tension - if you continue to hear it, something isn't working, the bottom space
is eroding. The muscles under your other
hand should be more and more relaxed as the caning proceeds; if not, it's also
a sign that your build-up is not succeeding.
This sign is apparent even in a silent bottom.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">As you gradually build the intensity, one useful trick is to
follow a harder blow with a quick light rain of flutter strokes, right into the
same area. These will distract the
bottom from any overload (within reason) and take them back to the bottom space
that has just been successfully processing light stuff. However, the harder blow will have done its
work of moving the whole scene to a slightly higher level.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>FURTHER CANING TECHNIQUE<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If your warm-up has opened the way for more powerful
strokes, care must be taken. Canes may
seem stiff, but a hard stroke can bend them ninety degrees and more, and a
wraparound with a cane can be downright dangerous. Wraps are most common when a
top goes to full power, after a well-aimed series of warm-up or measuring
strokes. The problem is in the top's
body dynamics: the momentum of the arm goes up exponentially with increased
speed, so the whole body is pulled forward as a heavier stroke is
delivered. The full-power stroke
automatically reaches several inches further than the lighter stroke that was
supposed to "gauge the distance".<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It's physics; you can't keep it from happening, any more
than you can walk on the ceiling. What you can do is allow for it, and train
yourself to compensate. You can ease
your feet back a bit, or pull your elbow or shoulder back as part of the
swing. Or you can do as Mistress Nan
Burrows recommends, and take your aiming stroke so that the cane tip lands in
the middle of the far cheek, no further.
This aiming point will land a full-power stroke that safely spans the
full width of the buttocks and no further.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If you do wish to play with harder strokes, practice! Learn to pay close attention to where your
cane is landing; this is how you learn to correct your aim. Mistress Nan advises a lot of practice on a
cushion. There is a certain kind of upholstery
that shows the stroke, but each blow shakes the surface and erases the trace of
the preceding blow. Perfect feedback!
The upholstery looks to be a kind of heavy-duty velvet; check thrift stores.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">When you are ready to try powerful strokes on a human
partner, try putting a cushion or blanket roll on the far side of them. This will catch a wraparound harmlessly. Be sure to confine hard strokes to the
buttocks below the tailbone and the upper half of the thighs.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>CANING AND OTHER PLEASURES<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sexual connections: perhaps a quarter of women, and a very
few men, can actually get orgasms from the cane. I think this is incredibly hot, and it makes
me very jealous! There will be others
who may not actually climax, but get extremely turned on, which can offer a
pleasant answer to the question of "what do we do next?"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The shock waves made by a cane are directional - they tend
to continue through the target in the general direction the cane was moving
when it hit. In fact, if you slide a
hand under your partner's thigh or belly, you can feel the shock of a medium
cane stroke go right through them. The
"sweet spot" in the lower butt, to either side of the crack, is sweet
for this reason; blows here can send waves up into a whole complex of muscles,
nerves, and engorged tissue that is directly involved with sexual
excitement. Many bottoms will enjoy a
steady rhythm of light or medium blows on the sweet spot - especially if they
are angled to send their shock waves up and forward. At least one lady I know has called the
effect a "rattan vibrator".<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">One good sign of this sexual connection is a face-down
bottom whose hips begin to rise and fall in a steady rhythm. You might try matching that rhythm, with
light or medium strokes. Or use your
other hand to massage the nerve points around the pelvic dimples and to either
side of the last few inches of the spine.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>POWER AND ROLE-PLAY<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Often when I do this, the scene is "pure S/M",
sensation for sensation's sake. No
role-play, and no more power exchange than a massage. The concern for smoothness, the bottom's
comfort and welfare, and cooperation is difficult to reconcile with many of the
traditional roles and scenarios, where the top and bottom play as
adversaries. However, there are a few
roles possible wherein the person who hits you is not an enemy!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Mentor/Ritualist: The top is a trainer, preparing and
coaching the bottom for some ritual ordeal.
Or passing on the secrets of mind control, wherein pain becomes
ecstasy. Or trying to send the bottom on
an astral observation of whatever, or a spirit journey, etc.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Comrade: Who is preparing an agent, or coaching a fellow
prisoner, to resist/survive an interrogation.
(Of course, the interrogation can follow later, with the top moving into
a new role, or new tops coming in for that part.)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Science Fiction: The aliens whose ship crashed think they
can recharge the damaged drive crystals, but only by tapping the energy
mobilized in what turns out to be this scene.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Some of these may sound hokey, but role-play always sounds
hokey to anyone who is not motivated toward that particular scenario. Find a script that works for you, and
suspension of disbelief will come much more easily.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Also, endorphins can lead many bottoms into a profound
submissive space. If you enjoy serious D/S or role play, you may find this endorphin-oriented
warm-up offers a startlingly good beginning to a more psychological sort of
scene.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>MAKING YOUR OWN TOYS<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Traditional canes are made of rattan, a woody reed from the
East Indies. It has a jointed stem that resembles bamboo, but is not hollow. Rattan is very tough and strong, and makes
the most durable natural canes I know. Like bamboo, it comes in all sorts of
diameters; traditional canes are about 8mm, but thicker and thinner ones are
also useful.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Rattan can sometimes be found at craft stores or Oriental
basketwork shops. It is used to make
wicker furniture, so a repairer of that might have a stock of it as well. Unfortunately, most of the cane-sized rattan
that comes into this country has been bent into coils, which warps and sometimes
cracks it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If you must deal with the coiled stuff, it should first be
cut to length with a fine-toothed saw.
Coping saws and hacksaws work well.
A dressmaker's tape is a handy way to measure along the coils. Obviously, you should not include cracked
places in your layout.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Less obviously, your canes will be much more durable if the
tip includes one of the joints of the stem.
The convoluted grain in each joint resists splitting, as opposed to the
very straight grain that runs for the foot or so between joints. A lot of the coiled rattan has been peeled
and sanded, but the joints are still noticeable if you look and feel
carefully. Cut the stem about a stem
diameter to one side of the joint; this will become the tip of the cane. (The ends without joints included are fine
for handles - the tips are what take the shock and strain.)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You can make the canes any length you like; I prefer 20-30
inches (50-80cm) as they are easier to aim and more convenient in close
quarters. Long ones have more power, but can be awkward. The natural variations in your coil will
probably give you several choices.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Each tip needs to be rounded off; any kind of edge here will
break skin far too easily. Coarse
sandpaper works well, especially in a power sander of some kind. Hand sanding will also do, as will a fairly
coarse metal file. Whatever you use, try
for a smoothly rounded end. Now
hand-sand the whole length of each cane with medium paper; try to remove the
stray fibers you find sticking up from the wood. They are a nuisance during varnishing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The cut pieces will have to be soaked and steamed to
straighten them without breaking. I soak
mind in the bathtub for a day or two, but any water will do. Don't let them dry out. After soaking comes steaming and
straightening. You will need some way of
keeping the canes straight as they dry; I lay them in a series of grooves I
routed into a plank, and then clamp another plank on top of them. You can also try shoving each one down a
length of pipe; plastic water pipe won't rust and stain the canes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">When you have your straightening rig set up, boil a big
kettle of water. Wrap the canes in a towel or two, lay them in the (drained)
tub and pour some boiling water over them.
Dose them every minute or so for a few minutes, and then unwrap them;
the scalding will make them limp and easy to uncurl. (Dishwashing gloves help keep your fingers
from scalding, too.) Quickly, before
they can cool, bend them straight and put them in the jig. Put the jig in a dry place with good
ventilation for five days (10 if you're metric). :-)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Remove the canes and hang them up for air drying; I use
clothespins on cords. After one day of
air drying, brush them thoroughly with a coat of spar varnish; Varathane works
well. Give each cane at least three
coats; let each coat dry enough that you can sand off any lumps. Some newspapers on the floor under them will
be a good ideas, since at least one of them will drip no matter how careful you
are.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The handle end of each cane can be left as is, or a grip can
be added for comfort or appearance. You
can dip the handle ends in plastic tool dip - it will take several coats, and
you can hang them from the same setup you used in the varnishing. The fumes of this stuff are truly nasty; be
sure you have good ventilation. Less
toxically, you can wrap the grips with cord or leather lacing, sew a scrap of
leather or cloth around them, or cover them with tape. Bicycle handlebar tape makes a fine grip.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You can of course prepare other kinds of wooden rods this
way - and avoid all the straightening hassle by picking ones that are straight
to begin with. Bamboo is cheap and
widely available, and also stiffer than rattan, which makes aiming easier. Bamboo, of course, is hollow and the tip must
be made at a joint, just as described for rattan. Bamboo works fine for light to medium blows;
heavy blows with it can be dangerous.
Bamboo can split without warning, and the splits have edges like
razors! Hardwood dowels from the
hardware store can have the same problems.
Avoid either of these materials for heavy canings.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Many other plants have cane like shoots. Forsythia is a very popular ornamental, and
the older branches from the inside of the bush can make quite a reasonable
cane. Prepare as you would rattan. They aren't as durable, but the price is
right, especially if rattan is hard to buy where you live. Apple trees develop suckers each year,
especially upward from the top branches.
These grow straight, to about the right length, and are pruned off in
great numbers every year. They are quite
tough and durable. The buds make rough little bumps along the shoot; they can be sanded off if they seem too
harsh.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Some twigs, such as birch or willow, are fine for scenes but
far too flexible to be considered or used as canes. Handling them is a whole different topic.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">There are also synthetic canes, mostly plastics. Plastics are much denser than wood, so they
hit harder and the stroke is more penetrating.
They are very easy to clean, which is a good thing because the thinner
ones break skin quite easily.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">There are shops in most large and medium cities that sell
plastic supplies. There can be a
confusing variety of materials there: Delrin, Lexan, and fibreglass are three
kinds of rod that are tough enough to make good canes. Acrylic is not tough enough; I have broken
several. If the clear look appeals to you, get Lexan. Sora, from San Francisco, makes some very
nice Lexan canes, if you want to buy ready-made. If you prepare your own, you won't need to
varnish them, but be sure to remember to round and smooth the tip!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-48731554495238390782015-10-19T18:52:00.004+01:002015-10-19T18:52:55.255+01:00BDSM A - Z: An introduction.... #worship #sextoys #roleplay<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Anal Play</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which the anus is involved.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating (General)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which one partner is beaten.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating - Canes<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which one partner is beaten with a cane.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating - Crops<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which one partner is beaten with a crop.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating - Floggers<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which one partner is beaten with a flogger.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating - Hairbrushes<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which one partner is beaten with a hairbrush.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating - Hard<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which one partner is beaten hard.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating - Paddles<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which one partner is beaten with a paddle.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating - Soft<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which one partner is beaten softly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating - Spanking<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which one partner is beaten with a hand.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating - Straps<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which one partner is beaten with a strap.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating - Whips<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which one partner is beaten with a whip.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating Location - Back<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating based acts that focus on the back as a target.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<a name='more'></a><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating Location - Bottom<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating based acts that focus on the bottom as a target.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating Location - Chest<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating based acts that focus on the chest or breasts as a
target.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating Location - Feet<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating based acts that focus on the feet (usually the
soles) as a target.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating Location - Genitals<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating based acts that focus on the genitals as a target.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating Location - Legs<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Beating based acts that focus on the legs as a target.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bestiality<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex with animals.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Biting<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts involving biting one partner with the teeth of the
other.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Blindfolds<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which blindfolds are placed over one partner's eyes
to remove that sense <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">(and often heighten others).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Body Modification - Branding<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Burning the body, often with a specific design, to leave a
permanent mark or scar.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Body Modification - Piercing, Permanent<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Putting an object through a part of the body for permanent
adornment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Body Modification - Piercing, Play<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Exploring the concept of body piercing but in a manner that
is temporary.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Body Modification - Saline Injection<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Injecting saline in to a part of the body to temporarily
engorge it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Body Modification - Scarification<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Deliberately causing scars, often through cutting the skin,
for adornment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Body Modification - Tattooing<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Adorning the body by permanently applying ink under the
skin.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage (General)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binding or restricting some or all of the body.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Breast<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binding or restricting the breasts.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Cuffs<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binding or restricting the body (usually the wrists) with
[hand]cuffs.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Genital<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binding or restricting the genitals.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Heavy<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Heavily binding or restricting the body, usually to the
point where no, or next-to no, movement is possible.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Intricate<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Intricately binding or restricting some or all of the body.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Light<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Lightly binding or restricting the body. Usually more
symbolic than actually restrictive.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Locks<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage that involves locks and keys.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Prolonged<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binding or restricting some or all of the body for prolonged
periods of time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Sleeves, Arm<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Restricting the movement of the arms by placing them in a
confining sleeve.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Sleeves, Leg<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Restricting the movement of the legs by placing them in a
confining sleeve.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Spreader Bars<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Restricting the movement of the legs by connecting them to
either end of a bar, usually forcing them open.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Stocks<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Restricing movement by placing the wrists and neck (though
may involve ankles) through a set of stocks.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Strait Jackets<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binding or restricting the torso and arms by placing them
inside a straight jacket.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Suspension<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binding or restricting someone so they are suspended above
the ground.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Suspension, Inverted<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binding or restricting someone so they are suspended above
the ground, upside-down.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage - Whole Body<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binding or restricting the whole body.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage Material - Chain<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binding or restricting the body, or parts of, with chain.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage Material - Leather<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binding or restricting the body, or parts of, with leather.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage Material - Rope<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binding or restricting the body, or parts of, with rope.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage Material - Saran Wrap<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binding or restricting the body, or parts of, with saran
wrap (clingfilm).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage Material - Scarves<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binding or restricting the body, or parts of, with [usually
silk] scarves.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bondage Material - Tape<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binding or restricting the body, or parts of, with [usually
adhesive] tape.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Breath Play<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Also called Asphyxiation. Acts involving restricting or
cutting off the supply of oxygen.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Catheters<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Inserting a tube in to the urethra to collect urine.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothespins<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Using clothespins to pinch parts of the body.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing - Chosen For<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Having your clothing choices made for you, usually without
the ability to appeal.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing - Corsets<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wearing corsets which control the shape of the waist and
hips.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing - Full Head Hoods<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wearing hoods that cover the entire head, leaving only small
holes for vision, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">breathing, etc. (if even them).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing - Harnesses<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wearing clothing that harnesses the body without necessarily
covering it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing - High Heels<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wearing high-heeled shoes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing - Lingerie<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wearing women's lingerie.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing - Masks<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wearing masks that cover the face.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing - Uniforms (General)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wearing uniforms that have a given significance.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing - Uniforms, Military<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wearing military uniforms.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing - Uniforms, School<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wearing schoolgirl/schoolboy uniforms.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing Material - Leather<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing made out of, or involving, leather.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing Material - PVC<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing made out of, or involving, PVC (the shiny plasticy
material).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing Material - Rubber<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing made out of, or involving, rubber or latex.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing Material - Sheer<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clothing made out of, or involving, sheer (transparent or
translucent) material.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Collars - Private<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wearing a "slave" collar in private.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Collars - Public<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wearing a "slave" collar in public.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Crawling<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The act of crawling on all fours to denote submission.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Cutting<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Deliberately cutting the skin.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Dilation - Anal<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Deliberately stretching the anus open.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Dilation - Vaginal<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Deliberately stretching the vagina open.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Discipline<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Submitting to, or receiving, the [often corporal] discipline
of another.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Drinking - Blood<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Drinking blood.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Drinking - Semen<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Drinking semen.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Drinking - Urine<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Drinking urine.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Electricity<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Using electricity for sensation or pain.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Enemas<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Applying liquid (traditionally warm water) in to the lower
intestine, via a tube. Often to induce uncontrolled, or hard to control,
excretion.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Examination - Physical<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Having your body physically examined and, often, appraised.
Sometimes this includes medical examination roleplays though, here, that is
listed as Roleplay - Medical.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Exhibitionism - Forced<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Exposing your body to others, nominally against your will,
at the will of another.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Exhibitionism - Voluntary<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Willingly exposing your body to others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Face Slapping<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Slapping the face, usually with an open hand, to cause pain
or denote position.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Fisting - Anal<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Placing an entire hand (the term "fist" is often
an exageration) inside the anus.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Fisting - Vaginal<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Placing an entire hand (the term "fist" is often
an exageration) inside the vagina.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Food - Chosen For<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Having your food choices made for you, usually without the
ability to appeal.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Food - From Body<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Eating food from another person's body. Either eating it
directly from them or using them as a platter.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Food - From Bowl<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Eating food directly from a bowl, like an animal such as a
cat or dog.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Food - From Hand<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Eating food directly from another person's hand.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Gags (General)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Devices used to limit, or prevent, verbal communication.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Gags - Ball<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A type of gag that uses a ball to effectively block any
verbal communication.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Gags - Bit<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A type of gag that uses a bar that goes across the mouth,
much like a horse's "bit".<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Gags - Ring<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A type of gag that uses a ring to force the mouth open while
providing access to the, now undefendable, mouth.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Gags - Tape<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Using adhesive tape across the mouth to create a gag.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Given Away (General)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Being given, at a partner's whim, to another person, usually
temporarily.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Given Away - Auctions<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Being given to another person as the result of a [slave]
auction.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Given Away - Permanent<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Being given away, at a partner's whim, to another person,
permanently.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Hand Jobs<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Pleasuring someone else's genitals with your hand.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Heterosexuality - Forced<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sexual acts with members of the opposite sex, nominally
against your will.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Heterosexuality - Voluntary<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sexual acts with members of the opposite sex, willingly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Homosexuality - Forced<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sexual acts with members of the same sex, nominally against
your will.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Homosexuality - Voluntary<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sexual acts with members of the same sex, willingly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Humiliation - Private<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which you are humiliated, degraded, or shamed, in a
private setting.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Humiliation - Public<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which you are humiliated, degraded, or shamed, in
front of others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Humiliation - Verbal<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which you are humiliated, degraded, or shamed,
through either the words of someone else (such as name calling) or your own
words.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Including Others<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts in which other people, from outside your immediate
relationship, are included.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Kneeling<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The act of kneeling to denote submission.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Leashes<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wearing a leash, attached to a collar (or other convenient
point).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Lecturing<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">An exposition of a given subject for the purpose of
instruction or reprimand.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Licking<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Using your tongue on another person's body [or, often,
anything they require].<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Massage<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Rubbing another person's body for their relaxation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Masturbation - Forced<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Pleasuring your own genitals, with your hand, nominally
against your will.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Masturbation - Voluntary<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Pleasuring your own genitals, with your hand, willingly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Nipple Clamps<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Placing clamps on the nipples to cause pain.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Nipple Play<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts that focus on the nipples.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Nipple Weights<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Applying weights to the nipples to stretch them, generally
to cause pain.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Nudity - Forced<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Periods of time spent without clothing, nominally against
you will.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Nudity - Voluntary<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Periods of time spent without clothing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Orgasm - On Command<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Having to orgasm on the command of another person.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Orgasm Control<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Giving control of when and how orgasms are experienced - and
when they are not - to another person.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Orgasm Denial<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Losing the right to have orgasms for an [often protracted]
period of time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Pain (General)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts involving physical pain.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Pain - Heavy<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts involving a very large degree of physical pain.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Pain - Light<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts involving some physical pain, yet without too great an
intensity - being more symbolic than serious.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Phone Sex<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Having sexually explicit phone conversations, usually
involving performing sexual acts at the same time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Rape - Fantasy<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts that explore being sexually used, nominally against your
will, by another person.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Rape - Fantasy, Gang<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts that explore being sexually used, nominally against
your will, by more than one other person.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Recorded Scenes - Photographs, Private<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Having photographs taken of you, either naked or indulging
in a sexual act, for private viewing only.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Recorded Scenes - Photographs, Shared<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Having photographs taken of you, either naked or indulging
in a sexual act, to be shared with others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Recorded Scenes - Video, Private<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Having video taken of you, either naked or indulging in a
sexual act, for private viewing only.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Recorded Scenes - Video, Shared<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Having video taken of you, either naked or indulging in a
sexual act, to be shared with others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Roleplay (General)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Scenes in which the participants take on and act out roles.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Roleplay - Age<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Scenes in which the participants take on and act out roles
based on being a different age (such as babies or naughty young girls).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Roleplay - Education<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Scenes in which the participants take on and act out roles
based on a scholastic teacher/student setting.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Roleplay - Interrogation<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Scenes in which the participants take on and act out roles
based on interrogations where one person is the interrogator and the other the
subject.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Roleplay - Kidnapping<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Scenes in which the participants take on and act out roles
based on one partner being kidnapped.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Roleplay - Medical<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Scenes in which the participants take on and act out roles
such as Doctor/Patient.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Roleplay - Pig<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Scenes in which the subject takes on and acts out a role
based on being a pig.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Roleplay - Pony<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Scenes in which the subject takes on and acts out a role
based on being a pony.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Roleplay - Prison<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Scenes in which the participants take on and act out roles
based on the prison world such as Sadistic Jailer/Vulnerable Inmate<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Roleplay - Puppy<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Scenes in which the subject takes on and acts out a role
based on being a puppy or adult dog.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Roleplay - Religious<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Scenes in which the participants take on and act out roles
based on the religious world such as confessionals or Bishop/Nun.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Roleplay - Whore<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Scenes in which the subject takes on and acts out a role
based on being a male or female prostitute, selling themselves to another
person for sex.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sensation Play (General)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts involving the senses and strong sensations.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sensation Play - Deprivation<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts involving depriving the subject of their senses (often
to heighten the remaining ones).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sensation Play - Fire<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts involving the sensations and apprehensions caused by
fire and heat.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sensation Play - Hair Pulling<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts involving the sensations and apprehensions caused by
having hair pulled.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sensation Play - Hot Wax<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts involving the sensations and apprehensions caused by
having hot candle wax dripped on to or applied to the body.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sensation Play - Ice<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts involving the sensations and apprehensions caused by
using ice or other cold items on the body.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sensation Play - Needle<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts involving the sensations and apprehensions caused by
using needles on the body, either scratching with them, or poking them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sensation Play - Scratching<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts involving the sensations and apprehensions caused by
being scratched.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sensation Play - Suction<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts involving the sensations and apprehensions caused by
having suction applied to the body.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sensation Play - Teasing<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts involving the sensations and apprehensions caused by
teasing the body.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sensation Play - Tickling<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Acts involving the sensations and apprehensions caused by
tickling the body.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving (General)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving another person in specific ways, putting their
pleasure ahead of your own. For example, a maid or a sexual servant.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving - Art<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving another person, putting their pleasure ahead of your
own, as a (usually immobile) piece of artwork such as a statue.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving - Ashtray<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving another person, putting their pleasure ahead of your
own, using a part of your body as a receptacle for their cigarette or cigar
ash.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving - Chauffeur<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving another person, putting their pleasure ahead of your
own, as their formal driver.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving - Dancer<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving another person, putting their pleasure ahead of your
own, as a dancer. For example, a belly dancer or stripper.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving - Following Orders<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving another person, putting their pleasure ahead of your
own, as they give you specific formal orders to follow.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving - Forced<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving another person in specific ways, putting their
pleasure ahead of your own, nominally forced against your will.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving - Furniture<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving another person, putting their pleasure ahead of your
own, as an immobile piece of furniture. For example, on all fours as a table or
a footstool.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving - Housework<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving another person, putting their pleasure ahead of your
own, performing household chores.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving - Maid<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving another person, putting their pleasure ahead of your
own, as a maid. For example, serving tea while wearing a uniform.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving - Sexually<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Serving another person, putting their pleasure ahead of your
own, in whatever sexual way pleases them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex - Anal<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sexual intercourse involving a penis entering your anus.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex - Cunnilingus<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sexually stimulating the vagina with a mouth/tongue.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex - Denial<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Going without sex, or sexual gratification, often at another
person's command.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex - Fellatio<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sexually stimulating the penis with a mouth/tongue.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex - Group<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sexual intercourse with more than one partner.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex - Penetration, Double<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sexual intercourse in which two orrifices (mouth, vagina,
anus) are filled.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex - Penetration, Triple<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sexual intercourse in which three orrifices (mouth, vagina,
anus) are filled.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex - Rimming<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sexually stimulating the anus with a mouth/tongue.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex - Threesome<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sexual intercourse with two other people.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex - Vaginal<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sexual intercourse involving a penis entering your vagina.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex - Vanilla<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Traditional sexual intercourse, without involving any kinks.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex Toys - Beads<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Having a string of connected beads (or balls) inserted in to
your anus or vagina and then pulled out.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex Toys - Butt Plugs<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wearing a "plug" inserted in to your anus.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex Toys - Dildos<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Using and/or being penetrated with a non-vibrating
artificial phallus.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex Toys - Eggs<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Variously known as Ben-Wa Balls, Love Eggs, etc. Two balls
made to be vaginally inserted which vibrate when you move or are battery
powered to vibrate.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex Toys - Public (Under Clothes)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Going out in public with a sex toy (such as a butt plug) in
your body, under your clothing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex Toys - Strap On<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Using and/or being penetrated with an artificial phallus
that fastens about a partner's waist.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex Toys - Vibrators<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Using and/or being penetrated with a vibrating toy, usually
an artificial phallus.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Shaving - Body<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Removing all traces of hair below the neck.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Shaving - Genital<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Removing all traces of hair from the genitals.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Shaving - Genital, Styling<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Shaving or trimming pubic hair, removing some but not all of
it in a given style.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Shaving - Head<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Removing all traces of hair from the head.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Showers - Brown<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Defecating on another person.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Showers - Golden<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Urinating on another person.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Speculums - Anal<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Using a medical tool to dilate (stretch open) the entrance
to the anus, providing access within.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Speculums - Vaginal<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Using a medical tool to dilate (stretch open) the entrance
to the vagina, providing access within.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Swapping (Partner)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sex between two or more couples where members of each couple
exchange partners and have sex with them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Voyeurism<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Watching someone, often without their knowledge, in a
situation with sexual connotations.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Worship - Boot<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Worshiping the boots of another person.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Worship - Bottom<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Worshiping the bottom of another person.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Worship - Breast<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Worshiping the breasts of another person.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Worship - Foot<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Worshiping the feet of another person.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Worship - Genital<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Worshiping the genitals of another person.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Worship - High Heel<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Worshiping the high-heeled shoes of another person.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wrestling<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wrestling with another person, overpowering them or being
overpowered.</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-70581922509926929692015-10-15T08:00:00.000+01:002015-10-15T08:00:01.983+01:00Are You Cut Out to Be Submissive?<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Are You Cut Out to Be Submissive?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.submissiveguide.com/2010/06/are-you-cut-out-to-be-submissive/"><span style="font-size: x-small;">From Submissive Guide Newsletter sent 12/7/09</span></a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqti_Myk7s3Mxs_MlwMgbe8QLn7xyY8fq1wHBfCpUyUzbyGgVmZEirWPjlD_RtPrELMCTP3IZV0fD-6QKO1oXcJP6DHOw-SlW8jkxMZs7AkDTtfE6pfSyxIaZdx-XZriQmQ0J25EfvzPs/s1600/%252B.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqti_Myk7s3Mxs_MlwMgbe8QLn7xyY8fq1wHBfCpUyUzbyGgVmZEirWPjlD_RtPrELMCTP3IZV0fD-6QKO1oXcJP6DHOw-SlW8jkxMZs7AkDTtfE6pfSyxIaZdx-XZriQmQ0J25EfvzPs/s320/%252B.jpg" width="239" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Not everyone is capable of being submissive. It is even
possible that you are not really cut out for it. We all have different
thresholds for what we can and can’t do, but realizing we can’t be submissive
isn’t the end of the world.</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Great, so how do you know if you can be submissive or not?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">First, let me say that the type of submissive I’m talking
about here is a relationship submissive; someone who is subordinate in everyday
things. A bedroom submissive or a kinky bottom is something entirely different.
Anyone, and I mean this, anyone can be a bottom for a short period of time. You
can be submissive for weekends or set amounts of time. I’m not going to cover
this form of submission in this article.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What I am going to cover is submission on a personality or
character level. Submissives all over are going to agree or disagree with this,
but as this is my newsletter, you are going to be subjected to my opinion. At
the end of this article I will invite you to share your own thoughts with me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">People develop specific personality traits, that then define
if they can be submissive or not. There are a few, however, that don’t lend
themselves to being a vital part of submission and can in fact cause a lot of
strife. If these can not be curbed it is likely you are not cut out to be
submissive.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span></o:p></div>
<a name='more'></a><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>POOR PERSONALITY TRAITS<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The personality traits I’m talking about are:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">selfishness and self-importance</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">domineering behavior</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">manipulative</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">bratty(!)</span></li>
</ul>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Selfishness is a very damaging trait to have when you are
trying to be submissive. For the longest time I used to tell myself that I
wouldn’t submit unless I got something in return. This got to the point that I
didn’t want to play unless I was getting an orgasm or something like that. I
was being selfish and made my needs and desires more important than my
partners.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Once I started seeing things as giving more I was actually
rewarded more often. It’s funny how life works out that way. I offered up more
and more of myself; I submitted to his will and in return, when I least
expected it, he rewarded me. It was so fulfilling and still is.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In all honesty I’m still working on the domineering
behavior. I’ve said it before and it bears repeating again; I am not perfect. I
submit because it fulfills a need in me. The behaviors I grew up with and the
traits I picked up to survive then are not needed now and I’m constantly
fighting to reverse them. My nagging behavior is one that Master is routing out
of me for good. I still get the itch to be in control of somethings but Master
is right there to set me straight. If you are constantly fighting for the
control then you will never submit. Submit is a lot like surrender. Accept that
your partner knows best for you and that they will care for you and your
domineering behavior will begin to dissolve.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Going into my next point, being manipulative is right up
there with domineering behavior. Forcing someone to do something they wouldn’t
do, or pushing so hard that they give in is not going to allow you to submit.
I’ve seen some submissives say that they are just being persuasive and that
their Dominant doesn’t mind. I have no doubt that if I asked them they would
say otherwise. Dominants do not want a submissive that tries to maintain
control or bend their will. It is counter-productive to the power exchange that
is the cornerstone of a D/s relationship.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Lastly, I’d like to talk about being bratty. I put an
exclamation point up there because there is a caveat to this point. A number of
submissives and Dominants alike say that being bratty is okay to a
relationship. It’s playful fun in other partnerships. I’m not against a little
playful fun; but being bratty and being playful are completely different
things. A brat is never welcome in a submissive. I consider bratty behavior to
be childish attempts to manipulate the situation. I’m certain that you have seen
people be bratty in a way that makes you shake their head and wonder why they
are submissive or why the Dominant doesn’t clock them one. It’s just bad form
and looks bad.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You will always be able to tell the difference between a
brat and a playful sub. Always.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>WHY IS IT IMPORTANT TO KNOW?<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Knowing the traits that are detrimental to a submissive’s
relationship and herself can bring about the change that is necessary if
submission is your goal. Let’s face the truth; you can change who you are. You
are the only person who can, so if submission really is what you want in life
you can make the changes necessary.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If you aren’t willing to work on these things and you enter
into a D/s relationship you are being misleading to a Dominant in your
intentions. How can you submit if you are not going to make the changes
necessary to be a submissive worthy of their charge?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Being aware of your non-submissive traits can also help a
perspective partner aware of what they are in for. I was straight-forward with
my Master that I had a lot of personal changes to go through in order to submit
in the way I wanted to and that he wanted from me. Thankfully he said he was
willing to work with me while I made the necessary changes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>WHAT NOW?<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You’ve made the first step if you can see these traits
hindering your submissive attitude and causing strife for yourself and your
partner. Next you need to start working on changing yourself. This is not an
easy process but it is possible if you wish it. Buy a few self-help books if
you need it to help you improve your behavior and figure out what skills are
needed to change your attitude.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You can also seek professional help or that of a mentor.
Many times having someone else talk to you about your struggle can bring you
closer to finding the person that is hiding in wait for you to shed those poor
behaviors. It’s likely this person is better for you anyhow.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If through all this you still can’t shake those feelings of
selfishness and manipulative behaviors you have just one admission left. You are
not cut out to be submissive.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Finally, I’ve given you the thoughts to get you started and
as you can see it’s not a dead end. If you are willing to work at it, and it’s
something you really want; then submission is possible. Good things are never
easy to acheive. Work hard at it and you will be rewarded.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>Thoughts to Ponder<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What personality traits do you consider poor for a
submissive to have that I may have forgotten?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Do you see yourself in this article? Where are you in the
journey?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Do you agree with the idea that submission can be achieved
if you want it bad enough?</span></li>
</ul>
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-7979328373280267682015-10-14T21:49:00.001+01:002015-10-14T23:38:49.712+01:00How to Interview a Dom/Master Prospect<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">THANK YOU TO: http://thejourneyofwill.blogspot.co.uk/2013/02/how-to-interview-dommaster-prospect.html</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://dominationsubmission.files.wordpress.com/2013/04/master_training.jpg?w=593" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://dominationsubmission.files.wordpress.com/2013/04/master_training.jpg?w=593" width="271" /></a>Y<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">our prince is out there, seeking you, hungering for you,
wondering where you are. But crouching between you and him are dozens of frogs
and trolls. A few of these are even handsome and well-spoken. And you must wade
through them, trying not to get slimed or bitten, before reaching your eventual
partner.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Just how are you to discern a poser from a dependable,
balanced dominant gentleman? A man with the qualities described in What to Look
For ...? You can't see into the past, or read minds, so you have one method of
discrimination before you take the risk of investing trust in a prospect:
inquisition—you ask him a ton of questions.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It's one of the hardest chores for many submissive women.
After encountering a gent she feels intrigued by, she must—although her sub
side may already desire his direction—play detective.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Many single subs overlook this phase, and expose themselves
to unsavory characters claiming BDSM expertise after a brief online
correspondence or phone conversation. Single sub friends of mine have had bad
experiences that they might have avoided had they vetted dom candidates more
carefully. One was physically mistreated on a first date, another was stalked
and had her car ransacked. Thankfully I don't hear such stories that often.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Here then are some tips on the art of investigation...<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
<a name='more'></a><br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Be sweet but skeptical. There are relatively few quality,
single, monogamous doms in the world. An awful lot of the so-called doms you're
likely to turn up (especially on kink sites) are insincere and/or unsafe. Don't
give a stranger the benefit of the doubt! Don't grant him more trust than he's
earned.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Present your questions as expressions of interest. Your
objective is information, but let him see that you're intrigued by him and want
to know all about him. And proceed at a relaxed pace, making space for him to
query you about things. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Start with instant messaging, from an anonymous webmail
account. I like Gmail, as it keeps chat logs. IM is interactive, and you can
tell something about the guy from the speed and clarity of his answers.
However, plain email may work better than IM via phone, since typing on a tiny
screen is slow and error-prone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Make phone calls without caller-ID. When ready to continue
the discussion by phone, make a talk appointment, and place the call yourself,
so you can hide your number. From the United States, dial *67 (*mp, think
"my privacy") and then his number. Or use Google Talk, Skype, etc.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Re-ask important questions a few times, over time. Many
people feel comfortable lying to strangers. Liars frequently don't remember
exactly how they answered questions previously, so you'll hear inconsistent
responses.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Watch out for B.S. Politely disengage if the guy says any
of:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Address me as sir/master/daddy/etc. [that comes later]<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You ask too many questions to be a genuine sub.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I'm the dom; I'll decide what to reveal and when.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">That question has no bearing on my relationship with you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Well I really don't blah blah blah... [evasiveness]<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Ask about relationships. The most important material you can
unearth is his relationship history. Does he say good things about the girls,
or does he blame them for things? Some of the topics:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What have been your most significant relationships?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">For each one:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - how did you meet?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - when did it end?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - how long did it
last?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - why did it end?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - are you still
friendly, if not why?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - what did you love
about that relationship?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - what about it didn't
work for you?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - what are the three
most valuable things you learned from it?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - what were the three
hardest moments during it?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - what were the three
best moments?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - how did you wish
she was different?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - how did she wish
you were different?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - what were your
biggest mistakes of that relationship?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Have you ever met another girl without your partner knowing?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What are your expectations of a partner? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What behavior by a partner most pleases or thrills you? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What behavior by a partner most upsets or frustrates you?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What are your biggest issues/vulnerabilities in life?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - how have those
surfaced in recent relationships?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Ask about kinks. You need to know if you have
kink-compatibility. Topics:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What are your most important kinks?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - how often do you
need them?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Do you enjoy vanilla sex?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What are the five most intense kinky things you've done?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - how did you do
aftercare in those cases?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">When have you pushed a partner too far?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - how did you deal
with those times?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What are your thoughts on safewords?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What are your hard limits?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Have you seen a partner subdrop?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - how did you deal
with it?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Have you made rules for a sub?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - what are some
examples?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - how have you
punished a sub for breaking rules?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Have you read how-to books or taken classes on BDSM?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Ask about deal-breakers. Most people have relationship needs
they're unwilling to compromise on. Find out what his are. And discover whether
he's compatible with yours! Also don't entertain the fantasy that either of you
can change the other to solve deal-breaker issues.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Ask about friends and family. His relationships with people
other than ex-partners may be telling.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Who are your closest friends?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - how often do you
see them?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - how do you spend
time with them?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If you have siblings, are you close with them?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - how do you spend
time with them?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - do you have nieces
or nephews?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Are you close with your parents? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> - what do you
like/dislike about them?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Reconfirm the basics. You may think you already know the
answers to these, but verify what you know.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">How old are you?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">What are your height & weight? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Are you married/separated/divorced/single?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Are you seeing anyone?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Are you polyamorous?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Do you have any children?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Are you employed, and in what field?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Do you live alone?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Do you have pets?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">How often and how much do you drink?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Do you smoke or do any drugs?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Do you have any history with the law/courts?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Do you own any firearms?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Make up your own questions. There's zillions of other things
you'll want to know about a prospective partner, for your own reasons. Ask
away!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Be patient. Take the time and care necessary to get to know
someone, on many facets of his personality, before you put your well-being in
his hands. Avoid being sucked in by D/s Gravity. Don't be afraid to back up or
walk away if it doesn't feel right to you. And be persistent; don't let the
frogs get you down.</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-18969808808657070562015-09-16T08:00:00.000+01:002015-09-16T08:00:12.635+01:00#submissive only follows text commands<a class="embedly-card" href="http://www.thedailyflogger.com/tng-submissive-only-follows-text-commands/">TNG Submissive Only Follows Text Commands</a>
<script async="" charset="UTF-8" src="//cdn.embedly.com/widgets/platform.js"></script>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-1118566932091148962015-09-14T11:00:00.000+01:002015-09-14T11:00:05.691+01:00"Daddy Dom" creepy but not criminal<a class="embedly-card" href="http://www.thedailyflogger.com/court-finds-daddy-dom-to-be-creepy-but-not-criminal/">Court Finds "Daddy Dom" to be Creepy But Not Criminal</a>
<script async="" charset="UTF-8" src="//cdn.embedly.com/widgets/platform.js"></script>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-62213896534562376432015-09-11T08:00:00.000+01:002015-09-11T08:00:03.062+01:00Good Girl - #BDSM #femsub #erotic story<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="MsoNormal">
byMissRileySapphire</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"You're going to be a good girl and do as I say
tonight, aren't you?" His voice melts into me, low and calm.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Yes" I whisper.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Yes, Sir" He corrects, His tone unwavering and
firm.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Yes, Sir," I repeat just as He finishes, too loud
but still sincere.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Good girl."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I blush, because I always blush when those words, those
words I ache for, grace His lips, so beautiful and affirming. Yes, I am His
good girl and I will earn those words again before the night is over.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The strap of His riding crop meets the hollow of my neck and
glides up, pulling my chin upwards with it. My eyes flutter open to meet His
and, for a moment, I forget myself. I am lost in the shimmery blue of His gaze
as it pierces me, staring too intensely and for too long...But not really. Sir's
heavy stare is just intense enough and never long enough. I want to drink it in
forever. I don't even realize that I've slid off of my knees until a sharp
"thwack" stings my right thigh.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Ow!" I complain, reality coming into focus as I
shift back up onto my knees and spread them apart, quickly and almost
instinctively. A few light taps on the sore spot confirm that I've effectively
corrected my position.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sir kneels downs onto one knee; His left leg is parallel to
my spine and one boot lands so close to my sex I can almost feel it. A shiver
runs through me and my breath hastens. He knows that I love His boots, and He
wants me to notice that He's worn them for me. But I noticed the moment He put
them on, of course; how could I not? I am constantly noticing all of Him,
lingering on all of the shapes and colors of Him, memorizing His smells and
sounds.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">He has captured my eyes again and it is like I am dreaming
of Him. Even kneeling, He is still above me and I tilt my chin up and purse my
lips into a smile for Him. Perhaps He thinks I'm being cheeky or coy, and
perhaps I am just a bit, but above all I am happy. Posed before Him, I find
myself flooded with feelings of contentment, comfort, and even relief.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"I love you like this, little one," He
compliments, His face light and sincere.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">He brushes a hand down my cheek and my hands float up to His
calf in response. Through His jeans, I reach of the muscles just above His
boot, grasping Him and hugging His leg toward my chest eagerly, as if He might
float away.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"You are small. You are safe. You are mine," He
continues. His voice is steady and sure but also hypnotic. His unquestioning
assuredness makes me feel incredibly small and undoubtedly safe. I believe the
things He says and I close my eyes as I weave them into my mind, willing His
thoughts to become my own.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In the darkness, I feel His thumb trace my lips and I pull
them into a kiss around it. He pushes into my mouth and I intake a shaky breath
as His thumb hooks behind my teeth. He curls a finger firmly under my chin and
forces me to bite softly on His knuckle, my mouth Held open ever so slightly.
My Heart beats frantically and I feel a hungry ache between my legs .My breath
hitches through my mouth as He pulls my Head up and nestles His own into my
neck. I feel His breath, hot in my ear and I tremble with excitement.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"You want pain, don't you?"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">His words are short and savory and my face lights up pink
with heat as I feel the muscles in my hands begin to quiver. I know He can feel
it against His leg and I return my hands to my knees in a feigned attempt at
composure. He is right; I do want pain, we both know it. It was easy to talk
about before but here, in this moment, I can't find the words to agree with
Him, so I nod.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Thwack." It is harder this time, against my left
thigh. The thud of His hand stays with me longer than the riding crop did and I
let out a moan over His thumb, still fixed between my lips.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"I've already corrected you once tonight, little girl,
don't make me punish you."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I shake my Head as fervently as I can around Him and manage,
"Yes, Sir."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I suck His thumb as it slides from my mouth and lingers for
just a moment before that same strong hand is petting my hair ever so gently.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I cast my eyes downward and smile to myself, waiting for Him
to continue.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"And you know what I am capable of doing to your
beautiful-," He lingers on the word, tracing fingers across my jaw
"body? The ways I can make you suffer?"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">My smile is stolen by another hitch in my breath and I nod,
remembering this time to address Him properly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Both hands are on the curve of my jawline now, as He cups my
face and pulls my gaze back to Himself. His eyes have shifted; they are lit
with something I've never seen, or noticed before. He inhales a deep breathe.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"You know I would never harm you. But I will hurt you.
I'm not afraid to give you what you need. Do you understand?"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"I do, Sir"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">His hands are strong and firm and oh so deliciously close to
my neck. He squeezes my face once before releasing me and I sigh into Him,
begging His hands to stay. He rises and moves behind me, leaving me on my knees
on the floor, listening carefully to His movements and the clanking of whatever
He is rummaging through. I think, for a moment, that I'd like to look behind me
and steal a glimpse of it but I decide not to. He didn't say so, but I'm sure
that Sir would prefer me to keep my position and...I'm also sure I'll find out
what He has before long.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I'm proven correct as He stands before me, holding a purple
blanket and a toy I've never seen before. It is a large, flesh colored thing,
with a base around the bottom as if to suction itself on to the wall or floor.
He is watching my reactions to it, as I take in the size of it, which is above
average but not too unrealistic, and try to predict He will do next. He seems
amused with me and I feel my face flush.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sir takes a few steps backward, watching me constantly as I
follow His boots with my gaze, and positions the dildo onto the sleek wooden
floor. He swirls the blanket around the base of it so it circles the cock like
a Christmas tree. I smile both because the idea is funny and because I feel
clever for having figured out His plan.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"I want you in that same position, except over Here,
with that cock inside of you."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I pause, waiting for further instruction, but His eyes
beckon me to stand and move, so I do.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Trying to kneel myself and get the toy into position is
clumsy and difficult but I try my best to be poised. Finally, with one knee on
the ground and the other up, I manage to move myself right onto the tip, just
barely kissing it like I had Sir's thumb. The size of it is suddenly urgent and
I realize that I haven't had something so big inside of me in such a long time.
I ease myself downward and urge my muscles to relax, but the stretching pain
intensifies as I try to edge downward and I wince.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sir sees me, and takes me by the shoulders, stopping my
decent.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"What's wrong, sweetie? Is it too big?"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Embarrassed, and not wanting to seem weak, I look away from
Him and chew on my lip. He rubs my shoulders, patiently waiting for my
response. I decide to be honest,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"A little, Sir."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"I can help with that," He says calmly, without
the slightest hint of anger or dissatisfaction in His voice, "get
up."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A tingle of relief and then curiosity rushes down my spine
and I obey. He leads me on to the bed and guides me to bend over it, face down.
My arms fold neatly above my Head and I nestle my Head into the blanket.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Stand up on your tip toes and spread your legs like a
good girl," He instructs and I comply instantly. I am silence, with my
Head buried into my hair. I adore when He talks to me like this, but it's as if
my own words flit from my grasp.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Yes, I would love to, Sir. Anything you want,
Sir." I imagine myself speaking, but I am silent.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The words are lost though the feeling is not, and so
obedience becomes my language. I close my eyes and spread my legs, pulling each
muscle in my thighs taut and curving my ass towards Him. I hope He can see my
effort, my enthusiasm, and can read in my movements those words I can't quite
reach.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">When I've formed a position I think He'll find pleasing, I
arch my back and relax into the softness of the bed. I stand stiff and
obedient, letting the cool air drift over my pussy. The feeling is soon
replaced by His hand, warm and large. He covers my sex with His palm and His
fingers dance across my clit. My hips roll with His movements and I let myself
breathe and sign audibly into my hair.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">My sounds spark something within Him and I bite my lip as He
sighs back at me, deep like a growl.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I feel His hand pivoting against me, rolling and then
sliding, wet. He tempts the opening with one then two fingers and, with a gasp
of breath, He is inside of me. His wrist rolls His fingers within me and my
hips rock with Him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">There is a hot tension in the air that we are beginning to
pierce. We could be hot, hungry, and feral with one another, but we are not.
Sir is restrained and purposeful now and it is somehow all the more arousing.
Sir plays my body like an instrument, becoming more skilled with each stroke,
and I surrender to Him, both body and mind. I am focused on Him and the
pleasure my submission gives Him and, now, He is focused on me; we are balanced
in beautiful harmony.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sir has been rocking, relentless, within me without changing
His pace and yet the intensity is steadily dropping. I realize that my pussy is
relaxing with every roll of His wrist; each thrust of His fingers is less
intense. He is stretching me so I can better accommodate the dildo jutting from
the floor. Suddenly, His rhythmic movements increase drastically in pressure
and I gasp again before pressing my face down into the blanket.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Three fingers feel like they are slamming within me, the
pulsing perfectly steady and I feel a shift in my lower body. It's as if the
rough thrusting is now not nearly intense enough. I am no longer fighting it
sensation but leaning into it my pussy aching for more, harder, faster.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Mmm," I moan into the bed, as Sir keeps pulsing
within me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">My world is tinted in swirling shades of turquoise blue. He
can't stop. He must not stop or I'm sure I will die right now.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Please don't stop. Please don't slow down. Please
don't speed up. Please God don't stop. You can't stop. Please Sir," My
mind is racing, but all I'm producing is muffled moans into the bed. But I have
to ask. I always have to ask before I'm allowed to -<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Please-" I mumble.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And my world is ripped apart, not by an orgasm, but by the
empty absence of His hand from my pussy. Turquoise turns to black and I scream
into the bed, frustrated, angry, crazed, so fucking close. I kick my legs and
roll over, throwing myself up onto my feet towards Him, bumping inelegantly
into His chest and staring up at Him like a defiant child. I am reckless,
separate somehow from the emotion bursting through me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"No! Fuck! No!" I scream in a frazzled panic. I am
shaking and flailing with uncontrolled fervor, so worked up I almost feel that
I could cry. I push my palms hard into his chest. "Why would you-"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I am silenced. His hand has cupped my mouth and jaw so
firmly that I can only breathe through my nose. His other hand is behind my
neck and pulling me forward so I can't back away. His hands are so large around
my Head that they almost touch each other.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I lower my eyebrows and continue to stare up into His eyes,
I want Him to know that I'm unhappy, that I was so close and He ripped His hand
away I squint up at Him, but His eyes are gentle, kind even. I let out a long
grunt or scream into His hand, grasping His unmoving wrist with both hands and
stomping my feet like a toddler. I feel like throwing nothing short of a
tantrum at Him, but I'm caught between His strong hands. I stomp and pull until
I am tired and my breathing becomes fast and shallow. Exhausted I lower my
hands and my eyes and feel just two small, frustrated tears slide from my eyes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Shh," He coos, still grasping my Head firmly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">My breathing slows, and I'm finally able to compose myself
and look up at Him, defeated and drained of my defiant anger. It's as if I'd
formerly lost myself and just now remembered that I am to be submissive to Him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"You're going to go back to the blanket, on your knees,
with that cock inside you now. Do you understand?" He lets go of my Head,
but I find myself instantly missing the hot pressure of His hands around me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Yes, Sir," I say, but remain still until He
points His finger.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I fold onto my knees and position the dildo as I did before.
It slides in, slick and almost effortlessly this time. But I am so full and,
once I am in my kneeling position with my legs spread, I realize that I am
quite locked into place. My breathing picks up at the both the bondage and my
muscles pulsing with need around the cock. Sir's hands on my shoulder surprise
me slightly, but in the same breath I am craning my neck back to snuggle my
Head into His hip. He is warm and, even though His pants, I can smell Him. I
know that He is aroused and it makes me aroused, too. I can feel wetness
escaping down the shaft of the cock, tickling my skin.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Something hard and cold shocks my wrist but Sir catches it
before reflex can jerk it away. I feel, but don't see, the handcuffs wrap
around my wrists, locking them behind my back. I roll my shoulders and try to
make my hands comfortable, straightening my back and sticking out my chest. The
cock feels as if it is spearing straight up from the floor and into me and, if I
didn't know better, I'd swear it were the one throbbing and hot. But that
feeling is coming from my own pussy, which seems to be edging itself back in
the direction of orgasm at its own will...No, at Sir's will. I bite my lip and
smile, almost floating at the thought of it. I am so exquisitely trapped.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sir crosses in front me and presents a second surprise, a
tin piled full with wooden clothespins. My body is hot with a mix of
anticipation, arousal, and fear. I look up to see Sir staring down on me with a
look of adoration. I blush at His gaze but don't release it. I feel locked into
His eyes as I Hear Him rummage through the tin. I still am swimming in their
ocean when I feel the smooth wood touch my left side. Somehow, my eyes don't
flit to the source of the stinging pinch Sir leaves behind as He draws His hand
away.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Pain just under the side of my breast demands my attention,
but isn't strong enough to draw my eyes away from Sir until the second
clothespin secures itself, just under its twin. The two demanding pins are too
much and I squint my eyes clothes, just in time to feel a third added.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">With each addition, the pain increases, along with this hazy
and confused feeling. There are too many pressure points attacking my senses.
It's as if my body doesn't know which to respond to first, and is instead whirl
winding them all together. How many are there, now? Six? Seven? I'm losing
count, and my mind is busy melting purples into blues. Everything is foggy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Are you okay, my girl?" Sir asks, His tone sweet and
concerned.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Am I okay? Sure. Yes, of course. I feel cool water on my
forehead; I've broken a sweat but I don't think I've made a sound. My eyes
flutter open and I examine Him, His face is gentle. Then I strain to look down
at my left side, which is pinching in one hundred places, even though there are
only twelve clothespins in a neat, curved line.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Yes, Sir," I breathe. I Hear my voice come out
low and breathy, less pitchy and controlled than it normally is.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">My eyes widen at the only thing that could distract me from
the pain radiating down my side. Sir unravels few feet of Hemp string and
kneels down beside me. The clothespins each pull at my skin in turn as He
purposefully threads the Hemp through each one.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Fuck," I grunt, pressing my eyes closed again.
Fear overrides pain as a struggle to breathe deep and calm my racing Heart. I
know. I know exactly what He is planning.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sir seems unbothered by my panicking. He just continues
dutifully until the clothespins are strung together in one long line. As He
finishes, the pain melts into one vague feeling and it is bearable again. With
a slight roll of my hips, it almost melts into the pleasure of the cock pushing
against my g spot. I calm my breathing and open my eyes. Sir steps forward; the
budge between His legs is so close to my face that I can touch it with my nose,
so I do. He pets my hair softly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"You are such a good girl," He hums, and I let my
face press closer against Him, moaning a little.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I swell with pride at His words, and straighten my body.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sir lets down His pants releases His cock towards me,
already so erect. I feel the clothespins tug as I shift my mouth on to Him,
warm and smooth. I purse my lips around the tip of Him and savor the salty
sweet flavor that is pulsing through Him and into me. I imagine that this
pinching, aching pain I am enduring for Him has made Him so aroused. The
thought fills me with Heat and pleasure and the pain at my side is suddenly
pleasure too. I adore Him this way, lost in His own sadism and toying with my senses.
He uses my body and I simply feel as if I am His. His to be used. His to be
toyed with. His.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sir shifts and His cock is suddenly rocking deeper in my
mouth, sliding against my tongue from front to back. His hands are laced in my
hair and I find myself wishing He would grab a fistful and pull. I open my lips
and my throat so I won't gag and relax my body, allowing Him to guide my Head
by my hair and enter me at His own pace. Each movement seems a bit stronger and
a bit deeper. His grip in my hair is tightening and He begins rocking me so
forcefully that I can feel the dildo push up within me with each thrust. I moan
around Him which makes me cough, but His pace never slows. Tears stain down my
cheeks. He is too deep now, but somehow not deep enough. I shift my hands,
longing to grasp at His legs, but they are still Held secure behind my back. I
am stuck. I am His. Everything, pleasure and pain and emotion, is intensifying
and melting into one sensation. I feel as if I will fly away. We are shades of
red, glittering with passion and intensity, glowing harder with every movement
of His body and every allowance of mine.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"You may cum" He offers, as if He can read me, and
He reaches for the string at my side.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Before I can process what He will do, the clothespins rip
from me in a one quick burst. The pain is sharp and strong and, in a burst of
light, my world goes white. I cum and I hurt and I shake and I scream onto His
cock. Everything overwhelms me and I am sure I have died for at least a moment.
I am a floating blur of feeling. I see myself crying out small sounds around
Him, mumbling His name and the word 'fuck' over and over again. My mind
re-enters my body and reality slowly and Sir's movements have stopped. The tip
of His cock still touches my lips and I suck gently, instinctively, on it. I am
a beautiful mess, shaking, limp, and wet all over, but I am His and nothing
else matters.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I feel as if I am still slowly waking up as Sir removes my
handcuffs and lifts me off of the floor and on to the bed. I find His eyes
again and they are alive with emotion, as blue as ever. His smile draws out my
own and He lies beside me. I roll and cuddle into His chest, closing my eyes
and savoring the feeling on His strong hands stroking my back. My pussy and the
line where the clothespins had been ache together and I feel a wave of
satisfaction and exhaustion. I listen to Sir's Heartbeat, which is fast but
slowing just like mine. He pulls me closer and kisses the top of my Head.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"What about you?" I ask, bringing my fingers to
His cock, still swollen.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"We're just taking a break, little one," He
laughs. "There is still plenty of time for you to tend to my needs,
alright?"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Alright, Sir" I smile and wrap my arms around His
chest, and nothing but Him exists in all of the world.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Good girl."</span><o:p></o:p></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-10534899017273553112015-09-10T17:02:00.000+01:002015-09-10T17:02:00.372+01:00Punishing Melody - #bdsm #femsub #story<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">We hadn't seen each other in months and the sexual
frustration was palpable as we rushed through the airport in search of the exit
for hotel shuttles. We undressed each other with our eyes and held a lengthy,
silent conversation that said we each had plans for how the night would unfold;
I was quite certain that our thoughts ran in similar tracks.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">He'd gotten into the city before I did so he checked us into
the hotel already, anticipating our mutual desperation. Thankfully, he'd had
the foresight to reserve a room at the hotel nearest the airport, so ours was
the first shuttle stop once we'd left the airport. Hopping off the shuttle, we
tipped the driver and grabbed my bags, then rushed inside. We had the elevator
to ourselves and took advantage of the opportunity to get each other pre-heated
on the way up to the 8th floor. To be honest, I'm not sure if it would have
mattered if we'd had to share the elevator with others, that's how badly we
needed each other.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Racing down the hallway, he hurriedly unlocked the door on
which he'd already hung the "Do Not Disturb" sign (I loved this man
and his ability to think ahead!), then slammed it shut behind us. Not bothering
to lock the door beyond its self-locking deadbolt, he pushed me toward the bed,
face down. Without a word, he lifted my skirt and ripped off my panties. In the
next second, I heard him unzip his pants, rip open a condom package and roll it
on his massively hard cock. Less than a minute from opening the door and he was
sinking his thick cock into my drenched pussy. Fully sheathed within my moist
heat, he paused for just a moment to enjoy the sensation and emitted a loud
growl of pleasure. And then he was moving. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This was no gentle lovemaking. It was a hard, desperate, and
almost brutal fucking; in other words, just what I needed. I was just as horny
as he was and for every thrust he gave me, I responded in kind. He slammed his
cock deep and hard into my pussy, battering my cervix with every thrust and
letting me feel his balls slapping against my engorged clitoris. I squeeze
Master's cock tightly, keeping him buried deep within me as we ride each other,
use each other's bodies for our mutual pleasure. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Normally, my Master is a man of extreme self-control who can
fuck for a good hour before needing to release, and he'll get me off at least
six or seven times before even thinking about his own orgasm. Not tonight
though. I was so sure that I had plenty of time to let that first orgasm build
into something of epic proportions that I wasn't even close to it when I could
feel him tensing behind me. When he stiffened like that, I knew it meant that
his orgasm was imminent. He thrust faster and harder, using my soaked pussy
like it was little more than a living masturbation sleeve. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">With a loud grunt, followed by an even louder scream of
triumph, Steve thrust his final thrust and released a heavy load of cum into
his condom. Pulling out of me, he tore off the condom, flipped me over, and
placed his still-hard cock at my lips. "Clean it," he ordered gently.
He was my Master, but his orders were usually worded gently because that's the
kind of man he is.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"But I ..." I began, starting to complain that I
hadn't reached orgasm yet. "You think I don't know when my slut does and
doesn't cum?" he asked me, and his tone was no longer gentle. "Clean
my cock like a good slut and then we'll talk."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Obediently, I cleaned his cock while my pussy and clit
ached. Was he upset with me? He's never treated me like this before. I spent a
couple minutes carefully cleaning his cock with my tongue, encouraged by the
fact that it was only semi-flaccid. Eventually, he pulled back and tucked his
cock back into his trousers, then zipped himself up and sat down on the bed
next to me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Turning toward me, he took my hands in his, looked in my
eyes and asked me very quietly: "Who owns you?"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Eyes widening, I looked at him with surprise. We hadn't had
this conversation in a long time and I couldn't understand why he'd be bringing
it up now. I must have done something to upset him, but I had no idea what it
was. "Y-you do, Master."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"That's right," he responded. "I do."
His left hand still held mine, but his right hand reached for my wet pussy and
grabbed it. "And whose is this?" he asked.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Y-yours, Master," I answered nervously.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Good girl," he said. "So far you're two for
two. Let's see if you can make it three for three," he said, and suddenly
I knew what was wrong. Or at least part of what was wrong. "You don't have
many rules, slut, but I do expect the ones I give you to be followed. What are
the rules for MY pussy?"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Lowering my head slightly, because I was too ashamed to look
into his eyes, I answer: "Your pussy must always be shaved and must never
be covered." The problem is, it had been a couple months since we'd seen
each other and since his rules only apply when we're together ... well, I
forgot.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Good girl," he said again, a bit condescendingly.
"You do know the rules, yet you chose to disregard them. That is why you
will not have the opportunity to cum until tomorrow, when you will have had a
chance to earn it. A slut is only entitled to what her Master allows her,"
he reminded me. I nodded my head and murmured an apology.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"I'm sorry, Master," I said quietly, afraid that I
would begin crying at any minute. I was ashamed at having forgotten, and always
hated to disappoint him. He released my other hand and patted my thigh in
acceptance of my apology.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"I know you are, slut," he said, and both his
words and tone were gentle again. "But it doesn't obviate your
punishment." I knew that without his saying it, but hearing it made my
head drop even further. "Go stand in the corner while I take my shower.
We'll deal with your punishment after I've showered and then we'll start this
trip with a clean slate. Deal?" I didn't really have a choice, but I
nodded my head as if it weren't a rhetorical question.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Thank you, Master," I said simply, then moved to
the corner he'd indicated. I'd been sent to the corner enough times to know
what he expected of me, and I would make sure I didn't fail him again tonight.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I stood in the corner with my legs spread wide, the toes of
each foot touching separate walls. My shoulders were straight and my head was
held high with my nose buried into the corner. My hands were crossed behind my
back and holding my skirt up at my waist, leaving my ass bare.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"A little wider please, dear," he said, referring
to the spread of my legs. I spread my legs wider and this forced my nose deeper
into the corner. "And thrust out your hips a bit better. Mmm. Yes, just
like that, my lovely slut," he said, coming closer and running a hand down
my back. He rubbed his hands over my ass cheeks, tugged at the plug that was
nestled between them to make sure it was secure, then slid a finger down toward
my pussy. With my hips thrust out like this, he could see not only my ass but
my pussy. With my legs spread wide, I could feel the cool air rushing over my
clit and labia and I knew however long he spent in the shower, it would seem
like much longer.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Good girl," he cooed, rubbing his thumb over my
clitoris. He stroked it fast and hard, the way I love the most, and only
stopped when he knew I was seconds from orgasm. "Tut," he said,
clicking his tongue. "None of that until tomorrow. Now hold your pose and
I'll be right back out." This was going to be the longest I'd ever stood
in the corner.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Normally, Master showers fast, but not tonight. When he
returned for me after about 15 minutes, my libido had cooled, as he'd known it
would. He led me from the corner toward the straight back chair at the desk. I
mentally groaned, but didn't complain. I'm short, so chairs like this pose a
problem for me. Standing behind the chair, Master tells me to bend over it and
make myself comfortable. It's not possible to be comfortable, of course,
because in order to bend over it I'm forced to stand on my tiptoes the entire
time. My large breasts heave over the top of the back and my legs arch from how
I have to stand. I grab hold of the sides of the chair, near its seat, and
spread my legs the way I know Master wants. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Are you comfortable, slut?" he asks me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">My head hangs low but there is nowhere for it to rest.
"Yes, Master," I tell him, letting him hear the contrition that's
already seeped into me, as if hoping that will encourage him to be lenient even
though we both know it won't; besides, there's a secret part of me that would
be disappointed if he was.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"There will be no wiggling once I start. If you wiggle,
I'll add more strokes. Do you understand, little girl?" He says the same
thing every time. I haven't been a little girl in a very long time but it's how
he refers to me at punishment time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Yes, Master," I answer. "I understand."
Next he'll tell me what my punishment is to be, even though I already know it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"It will be 20 strokes for each infraction. For each
stroke you don't count, you will receive another. Do you understand?"
Twenty strokes! I mentally screamed. I must have hesitated too long before
responding because he prodded me. "Yes, little one. I reminded you last
time that if I had to punish you again for the same thing, I'd be adding an
extra five to the total." I'd forgotten that too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Y-yes, Master," I say quietly. "Twenty
strokes for wearing panties, another twenty for not shaving, and I must count
them. I understand."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">He held his leather belt in his right hand and gently rubbed
my ass with his left for a good minute, calming me. He waited until he could
tell that I was mentally prepared before he started. My Master was a kind and
gentle man most of the time, but he knew how to wield a belt. When the leather
first cracked against my tender skin, I wanted to flail and holler; instead, I
cried out a solid "One, sir!" The next four strokes came very fast
and hard, leaving me no time to think about anything other than counting out
their numbers, and making sure they were loud enough that he could hear me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But to be effective, a good punishment must be memorable.
After the fifth stroke, Master paused to rub my ass, soothing out the sting a
little bit. You'd think he was doing me a kindness, soothing away the sting,
but really that made it worse when he picked up the belt again. He wasn't
gentle, but he knew what he was doing; moreover, he knew how much I could
withstand. I kept counting, not missing so much as a stroke, but by the time he
got to the first set of twenty, my voice was a higher pitch than usual, which
meant that I was nearly in tears. I knew that my ass was bright red and welted,
and that I would bear bruises from this beating for at least a week. Still, I
gripped that chair tightly and continued to count. As we moved past twenty, I
remembered to begin breathing deeply. Somewhere around stroke twenty-five, the
burning of my ass had become a warm glow that settled around me like a
comforting friend. When the last stroke fell, I realized that I'd been crying
through at least the last fifteen strokes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Master dropped his belt to the floor, helped me stand, then
led me by the hand over to the bed. He pulled me into his arms and cradled me,
stroking my hair and back, dropping tender kisses on my head, and telling me
what a brave, good girl I'd been. I continued to sob for many minutes,
releasing all of the stress I'd been feeling for the past few months, until I
finally ran out of tears. I gave a quiet hiccough, then turned my head up to
look at my Master with blood-shot eyes and tear-streaked cheeks. I knew my face
was blotchy, because it always is after a long cry, but he never seemed to
mind. I gave him a tremulous smile and then thanked him. He never insisted on a
show of gratitude after a punishment, but I always felt compelled to give it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Feel better now, baby?" he asked me tenderly, his
voice full of love.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I gave a quick nod of my head, widened my smile, and
answered, just as lovingly. "Mmm. Yes, Master." <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Our vacation was off to a fabulous start.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Punishing Melody<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">by <a href="https://www.literotica.com/s/punishing-melody">Selenite</a></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-24827266433339789702015-09-06T16:13:00.002+01:002015-09-06T16:13:54.977+01:00Total Power Exchange<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The phrase "Total Power Exchange"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Total Power Exchange" was coined in the newsgroup
alt.sex.bondage during debates with Jon Jacobs and his opponents in the mid
1990's.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In 1997 Davis gave this definition, in bold, along with a
lot of asides (in brackets):<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A TPE (Total Power Exchange) relationship, sometimes
described as an absolute lifestyle d&s relationship (that such
relationships can actually be neither "total" or "absolute"
is agreed; these are ideal states to be worked towards but which will not be
achieved, which is why TPE may be better seen as a process or goal than as a
state), is a relationship in which no impediment to the exercise of the owner's
power is accepted (some may, of course, exist, and what prudent owners do is to
avoid direct collisions with these impediments, while working to overcome those
that can be overcome (since the laws of gravity can't be overcome, a sane owner
isn't going to ask a slave to fly (w/o appropriate equipment, of course), nor
will a sensible owner try push a slave into things that are hard limits for hir
(but the owner might push a slave up against what the slave thinks are hard
limits but which sie can in fact overcome)). Such things as safewords,
contracts, negotiated limits, and anything else which recognizes / acknowledges
/ formalizes limits on the owner's power are inimical to TPE.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Internal Enslavement" and "Total Power
Exchange" cover much of the same ground. However, we feel that there are
some marked problems with the term TPE.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">First, "total" power over anything is never
achievable due to the presence of external contraints and immutable attitudes
(see Davis' example of the laws of gravity above.) This means that people
talking about TPE relationships can find themselves continually qualifying the
word "Total" in the face of "but what if he told you to shoot
your children?" objections.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Secondly, the common thread in most of these relationships
is that the dominant acquires authority not just "power". That is,
the dominant's control of the submissive is acknowledged as being rightfully
his. Furthermore, he may retain authority over some aspect of the submissive
even when she is showing resistance and he does not have power over it at the
time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Finally, power or authority is not "exchanged". It
is unilaterally taken by the dominant from the submissive. Even if we wish to
say that the submissive does gain some form of "power", this does not
come from the dominant (it is not part of his power) even if he enables the
submissive to achieve it. For example: if the submissive acquires the power to
accept his decisions gracefully. Consequently, power is transferred in one
direction, rather than exchanged both ways.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">However, terminological purity aside, people pursuing M/s
relationships usually know what is meant by "Total Power Exchange"
even if it's ambiguous when taken literally.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">28 January 2001.- <a href="http://www.enslavement.org.uk/tpe">http://www.enslavement.org.uk/tpe</a></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-57534751136057915592015-06-29T10:33:00.000+01:002015-06-29T10:33:00.500+01:00Five point scale of bottoms - how much authority over the "bottom" is acquired by the "top"<div>
<span style="font-size: x-small;">COURTESY OF: <a href="http://www.enslavement.org.uk/fivepoint">www.enslavement.org.uk/fivepoint</a></span></div>
<br /><div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/hphotos-xaf1/t51.2885-15/e15/11313721_891337780927808_1258639525_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/hphotos-xaf1/t51.2885-15/e15/11313721_891337780927808_1258639525_n.jpg" width="400" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This is a scale of how much authority over the
"bottom" is acquired by the "top". It is an attempt to
describe a system of terms which will be useful in discussing the various
phenomena associated with SM, D/s and M/s.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In itself, this ordering is not intended as a value
judgement. However, many people implicitly place higher value on more intense
activities and so something similar to this list is lurking in the subconscious
of many BDSM subcultures. This gives rise to two widespread causes of
antagonism: people looking up the scale with a "even if you're a
submissive (or slave), you're no better than us masochists (or
submissives)" agenda; and people looking down with a "stop pretending
you're really a submissive (or slave), you're just a masochist (or a
submissive)" attitude. It is not unusual for the resulting arguments to
hinge on the word "genuine", as one group is not the genuine article
according to the definition of the other.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">My opinion is that most SM vs D/s vs M/s arguments are
caused by the belief that everyone should call themselves whatever they like,
and that common definitions are inappropriate. My belief is that meaningful
communication is impossible without commonly held definitions.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>1. Fetish bottom</b>: "I worship your boots and want to
serve them."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Fetish bottoms differ from other types of fetishist in that
the object they eroticise is associated with a top. They are almost invariably
male, and in the pure form have little need to interact with the top or to submit
their will in real life encounters.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>2. Masochist:</b> "I want you to use the needles
tonight."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Masochists take things a step further and grant the top
authority to subject them to pain or humiliation, or perhaps to physical
control such as bondage. However, the dynamic of these scenes is still one of
equality, and it is clear that everything is done for mutual gratification.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>3. Roleplay submissive</b>: "Can I be the
Girl-Caught-Shoplifting tonight?"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This involves assuming roles for a temporary scene (from a few
hours up to a few days) which would normally be associated with inequality and
with one person having power or authority over the other: for example, a store
detective blackmailing a shoplifter into obeying him. However, it is understood
that the goal of the scene is direct mutual satisfaction for both top and
bottom (eg, that the "shoplifter's" desire to be held down,
"ravished" and sworn at is catered to.)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>4. Servant: </b>"What can I do for you now, Sir?"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This can sometimes be difficult to distinguish from a long
term relationship involving roleplay submission. However, the essential feature
of a servant or service orientated submissive / bottom is their desire to do
things purely for their top's benefit (literally, to serve.) Hence, a servant
may derive great satisfaction from doing housework at the top's home.
Nevertheless, this kind of service is voluntary and is an example of
"ongoing voluntary submission". The bottom constantly chooses to stay
and to serve, even if that choice is just implicit in their continued presence
and obedience.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>5. Slave: </b>"You have the authority to decide things for
me, Master."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A slave differs from other types of bottom in that they have
no (enforceable) rights with respect to the top. In particular, they cannot
remove themselves from the relationship, and cannot themselves chose to impose
restrictions on what is done to them. This lack of rights in the face of the
top's acknowledged authority over them constitutes ownership. The difference
between a servant and a slave can be summarised by: "Ownership rather than
obedience is the defining quality of slavery; obedience rather than ownership
is the defining quality of submission." --><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">There are two further subdivisions:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">5a External Enslavement - in which slavery is enforced by
external forces, such as threats to hunt slaves down and retake possession of
them if they run away. This approach has limited plausibility in a modern
society, at least for any length of time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">5b Internal Enslavement - in which slavery is acheived by
forging an emotional bond which the slave cannot extricate themselves from.
This approach is ultimately dependent on the validity of the Internal
Enslavement Hypothesis (in short, that submissives with such a great need to be
owned exist, and that a Master can create a psychological environment in which
that need comes to the fore.)</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-49244137630667933372015-06-28T18:36:00.002+01:002015-06-28T18:50:52.600+01:00Three Principles in Internal Enslavement<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/hphotos-xaf1/t51.2885-15/s320x320/e15/11419288_1442103476096728_1391839813_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/hphotos-xaf1/t51.2885-15/s320x320/e15/11419288_1442103476096728_1391839813_n.jpg" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This article describes three general principles of use in
Internal Enslavement, which are echoes of maxims in other contexts:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">1. Do no harm.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">2. Know your slave.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">3. Build on foundations.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>Do no harm</u></b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></u></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Clearly harm is a relative concept. However, one must consider
the possible consequences of one's actions to avoid unwanted effects, and by
"harm" I mean unwanted, long lasting damage, to the mind or the body.
In particular, do not underestimate the psychological damage that unpredictable
behaviour or severe punishments can produce: all the way from an inhibiting
nervousness around certain objects to full blown traumatisation, since these
can impede or reverse the Enslavement process.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>Know your slave</u></b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></u></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">One needs information to manage any complex system, and the
psyche of a developing slave is no exception. The proper study for a Master is
his slave.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Practices such as the keeping of a slave journal, or regular
face to face debriefing sessions are manifestations of this principle. They
attempt to gain access to the slave's inner life, which is usually a private
world in free persons and is often remarkably different to what the Master
might expect.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The evolving history of a slave's inner world is the slave's
Enslavement, and to manage it successfully, the Master must become that
country's historian, its prophet and its leader.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>Build on foundations</u></b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></u></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Mere factual knowledge and expertise, such as position
training, is only the surface expression of service and obedience. If it is
only skin deep, the Master's possession of the slave is no more than skin deep.
It is true that superficial training, using the rational mind of the slave,
plays an important part in the deeper, emotional changes we seek, but they are
two distinct layers.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It is hard work creating new beliefs and attitudes from
scratch, since these emotional states are built up by experience over time. But
it is these emotional states which we are seeking to grow and guide in the
process of Internal Enslavement: by finding what is there already that can be
used and expanded, our work can be done more easily and more naturally, in a
way suited to where the slave actually is.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Conclusion<o:p></o:p></span></u></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In summary, no adult human is a blank slate: everything you
do to a slave is in the context of the inner self produced by their past
history. By studying the slave, and building on and adapting what is already
there, one can benefit from the current reality of the slave's state rather
than fighting against it. With this solid foundation, the slave can grow
naturally, guided by her Master's requirements, and her service can be molded
to suit his requirements with external training which is informed rather than
blind.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
(The original version of this article appeared as part of
the Internal Slave Development Manifesto in March 1999)</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-32592562881322362152015-06-28T18:26:00.002+01:002015-06-28T18:51:07.576+01:00Ego states, Parent - Adult - Child<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">By lili <<a href="mailto:lili@tanos.org.uk">lili@tanos.org.uk</a>><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Many people talk about the child inside the submissive.
Their "inner child" or the "little girl inside". So many,
infact, that there must, undeniably, be something in it. I know that I have had
far more experiences in a "child-like" state since entering the
process of Internal Enslavement than I ever had previously. If I am honest,
probably more than I have had since being a very small child myself.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In many ways the kind of upbringing I had led to my growing
up fast. Living with two parents who hated being in the same room as each other
meant that I spent whatever time I could out of the house. I grew up fast,
infact you could say that I was adult before my time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">IE freed the child in me, but that doesn't mean that I am
childish, although, in many ways I can be very childlike. Equally, I do not
enter a state of being childlike and find myself annoyingly trapped there. I am
as capable of actively using the adult in me as I am using the child (at least
nowadays I am, anyway.)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So what does this all mean? Am I just a little girl wanting
a good "father-figure"? Could it be true that in order to achieve M/s
a Dominant needs to parent a perpetual grown child? Personally, I find this
hard to believe.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Eric Berne describes the Child as one of 3 ego states in his
description of "Transactional Analysis" (TA). In brief, he describes
3 ego states which he named "Adult", "Parent" and
"Child". The "Parent" can be described as "controlling
and nurturing", The "Adult" as "sensible and logical"
and the "Child" as "playful and childlike". Infact it is in
the ego state of "Child" that we experience most joyously and equally
most tragically, our lives.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I feel that I should point out now that my embarrassingly
brief explanation of what took Berne a career to develop does not, by any
means, do it justice. I can only say that, if you are in the slightest bit
interested in TA, you could do worse than reading Eric Berne's "Games
people play" or Claude Steiner's "Scripts people live". I read
them both and found them fascinating.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I have come to realise that, for many years now, the child
in me was supressed, mostly because she is the one hurt by the world outside.
This meant that, although I could use and control my Adult and Parent ego
states, I lost the ability to access the Child and this left me incomplete. Not
that far into the process of IE something strange started happening to me. I
began to feel afraid of loosing myself again. Of course, on the surface of
things, this didn't make sense. Logically I knew I needed slavery, I also was
beginning to realise that to be whole again I had to regain the ability to use
my Child ego state freely. However, what I began to experience was the Child
running wild. For a time this felt wonderfully freeing, but, after a while, I
felt as though I was being smothered by it. The Child was running free at the
expense of my other 2 ego states.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The Parent and the Adult aspects of me are the ones I have
relied on for survival for such a long time. I know how they work and I have
learned, over time, which ego state copes best in what situation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The Child in me was hidden away for so long that, for a
time, I felt unpredictable in that ego state. I found myself acting in ways I
would have never done before. I also began to find it progressively more
difficult to switch to a more appropriate ego state than Child, for example,
when I felt scared it's would have been better for me to use my Adult or Parent
ego states than the Child ego state (I experience things far more intensely and
less logically in "Child" than I do in either Adult or Parent.)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Whenever I delt with situations, inappropriate for a Child
ego state, I ended up feeling frustrated, I was having tantrums or sulks and at
times I was begining to thoroughly annoy myself (goodness only knows how Tanos
put up with me!)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In some ways this gave me a very real sense of loosing
myself, in that I didn't always feel in control of my own emotions. At that
time I was awash with childish reactions and emotions and I really didn't know
how to deal with them, or even if I should be attempting to.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In the end I just let them go and stopped trying to suppress
them. Sometimes it really is better to let go of the old in order to embrace
new ways of handling things. (How I wish it was as easy to do as it is to just
say these words.)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I know now that Tanos stayed in control of the situation
throughout my transition, but, at the time, I was still scared. He told me to
let go and trust him and I knew that was exactly what I needed to do, but
saying it didn't make it happen (time did that instead.)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Knowing how this all affected me, and knowing what I have
learned about the ego states, I am convinced of how unhealthy it would be for
anyone to be encouraged to use just one ego state. By encouraging the use of
one ego state (Child) at the expense of the others (Adult and Parent) would be
to deny us from using the very things which have kept most of us (particularly
submissives) safe all our lives. We would become incapable of using all the
healthy ways of coping, with life and with ourselves.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">For a while I went through a stage of only being able to
access my Child ego state with Tanos. I believe this had alot to do with the
fact that I had supressed my Child as a way of coping with life, myself. So
when I finally found a safe place to be the Child, I ran amock as a Child. I
over used it, because I was so delighted in the way it made me feel. I enjoyed
things in a completely different way, in a way I had forgotten how to.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In the end I just irritated myself to death with it. I feel
far more balanced now, I am better able to bring the appropriate ego state into
play, sometimes with prompting by Tanos (usually as a response to his present
ego state.)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Tanos has an extremely strong Adult, something that
gradually has helped me to connect to my own weakened Adult. I'm not too sure,
now, how much of our relationship is actually Parent - Child. We spend a great
deal of our time in Adult - Adult as well as Adult - Child interactions.
Ofcourse there is an element of Parent - Child but we also have quite alot of
Child - Child too (especially when we are doing and enjoying the things we like
doing together!)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u>Conclusion</u></b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><u><br /></u></b></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I must admit that I am unconvinced that
"parenting" is what, fundamentally, underpins an M/s relationship,
although it does, to some degree, seem to be part and parcel of accessing the
submissive's inner self. I suppose if we accept that everyone has an inner
Parent, Adult and Child then a Master who is able to access and even control
those ego states, will be gaining access to a better understanding of his slave
as well as gaining the ability to control her ego states as an appropriate and
desired response to his own. I realise, with hindsight, that Tanos and I have
been working in the past in compatible ego states, without having prior knowledge
of what they were called. I certainly, and quite obviously, switch P-A-C ego
states in response to Tanos. I am not his child, although I have a little child
inside me, but then, according to Eric Berne, so do you.</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-12125357679825402702014-01-21T10:00:00.000+00:002014-01-25T22:18:20.204+00:00Etiquette 101 - Conversation<div class="MsoNormal">
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Etiquette exists in some form in all countries, has existed
and will exist in all ages. From the rudest savage who dares not approach his
ignorant, barbarous ruler without certain forms and ceremonies, to the most
polished courts in Europe, or the home circles of America, etiquette reigns.</span><o:p><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span></o:p><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">True politeness will be found, its basis in the human heart,
the same in all these varied scenes and situations, but the outward forms of
etiquette will vary everywhere. Even in the same scene, time will alter every
form, and render the exquisite polish of last year, obsolete rudeness next
year.</span></i></blockquote>
<br />
<br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
<b><u>CONVERSATION.<o:p></o:p></u></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="http://magazine.motilo.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/Ladies-1950s-advert.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://magazine.motilo.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/Ladies-1950s-advert.jpg" height="320" width="252" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The art of conversation consists in the exercise of two fine
qualities. You must originate, and you must sympathize; you must possess at the
same time the habit of communicating and of listening attentively. The union is
rare but irresistible. None but an excessively ill-bred person will allow her
attention to wander from the person with whom she is conversing; and especially
she will never, while seeming to be entirely attentive to her companion, answer
a remark or question made to another person, in another group. Unless the
conversation be general among a party of friends, confine your remarks and
attention entirely to the person with whom you are conversing. Steele says,
"I would establish but one great general rule in conversation, which is
this—that people should not talk to please themselves, but those who hear them.
This would make them consider whether what they speak be worth hearing; whether
there be either wit or sense in what they are about to say; and whether it be
adapted to the time when, the place where, and the person to whom, it is
spoken."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The art of conversation consists in the exercise of two fine
qualities. You must originate, and you must sympathize; you must possess at the
same time the habit of communicating and of listening attentively.</span></i></blockquote>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></div>
<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Be careful in conversation to avoid topics which may be
supposed to have any direct reference to events or circumstances which may be
painful for your companion to hear discussed; you may unintentionally start a
subject which annoys or troubles the friend with whom you may be conversing; in
that case, do not stop abruptly, when you perceive that it causes pain, and,
above all, do not make the matter worse by apologizing; turn to another subject
as soon as possible, and pay no attention to the agitation your unfortunate
remark may have excited. Many persons will, for the sake of appearing witty or
smart, wound the feelings of another deeply; avoid this; it is not only
ill-bred, but cruel.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Remember that having all the talk sustained by one person is
not conversation; do not engross all the attention yourself, by refusing to
allow another person an opportunity to speak, and also avoid the other extreme
of total silence, or answering only in monosyllables.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If your companion relates an incident or tells a story, be
very careful not to interrupt her by questions, even if you do not clearly
understand her; wait until she has finished her relation, and then ask any
questions you may desire. There is nothing more annoying than to be so interrupted<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Never interrupt anyone who is speaking. It is very ill-bred.
If you see that a person to whom you wish to speak is being addressed by
another person, never speak until she has heard and replied; until her
conversation with that person is finished. No truly polite lady ever breaks in
upon a conversation or interrupts another speaker.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Never, in speaking to a married lady, enquire for her
husband, or, if a gentleman, ask for his wife. The elegant way is to call the
absent party by their name; ask Mr. Smith how Mrs. Smith is, or enquire of Mrs.
Jones for Mr. Jones, but never for "your husband" or "your
wife." On the other hand, if you are married, never speak of your husband
as your "lord," "husband," or "good man," avoid,
also, unless amongst relatives, calling him by his Christian name. If you wish
others to respect him, show by speaking of him in respectful terms that you do
so yourself. If either your own husband or your friend's is in the army or
navy, or can claim the Dr., Prof., or any other prefix to his name, there is no
impropriety in speaking of him as the colonel, doctor, or whatever his title
may be.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It is a mark of ill-breeding to use French phrases or words,
unless you are sure your companion is a French scholar, and, even then, it is
best to avoid them. Above all, do not use any foreign word or phrase, unless
you have the language perfectly at your command. I heard a lady once use a
Spanish quotation; she had mastered that one sentence alone; but a Cuban
gentleman, delighted to meet an American who could converse with him in his own
tongue, immediately addressed her in Spanish. Embarrassed and ashamed, she was
obliged to confess that her knowledge of the language was confined to one
quotation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Never anticipate the point or joke of any anecdote told in
your presence. If you have heard the story before, it may be new to others, and
the narrator should always be allowed to finish it in his own words. To take any
sentence from the mouth of another person, before he has time to utter it, is
the height of ill-breeding. Avoid it carefully.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Never use the phrases, "What-d-ye call it,"
"Thingummy," "What's his name," or any such substitutes for
a proper name or place. If you cannot recall the names you wish to use, it is
better not to tell the story or incident connected with them. No lady of high
breeding will ever use these substitutes in conversation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Be careful always to speak in a distinct, clear voice; at
the same time avoid talking too loudly, there is a happy medium between
mumbling and screaming. Strive to attain it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Overlook the deficiencies of others when conversing with
them, as they may be the results of ignorance, and impossible to correct. Never
pain another person by correcting, before others, a word or phrase
mispronounced or ungrammatically constructed. If your intimacy will allow it,
speak of the fault upon another occasion, kindly and privately, or let it pass.
Do not be continually watching for faults, that you may display your own
superior wisdom in correcting them. Let modesty and kind feeling govern your
conversation, as other rules of life. If, on the other hand, your companion
uses words or expressions which you cannot understand, do not affect knowledge,
or be ashamed of your ignorance, but frankly ask for an explanation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In conversing with professional gentlemen, never question
them upon matters connected with their employment. An author may communicate,
voluntarily, information interesting to you, upon the subject of his works, but
any questions from you would be extremely rude. If you meet a physician who is
attending a friend, you may enquire for their progress, but do not expect him
to give you a detailed account of the disease and his manner of treating it.
The same rule applies to questioning lawyers about their clients, artists on
their paintings, merchants or mechanics of their several branches of business.
Professional or business men, when with ladies, generally wish for
miscellaneous subjects of conversation, and, as their visits are for
recreation, they will feel excessively annoyed if obliged to "talk
shop." Still many men can converse on no other subject than their every
day employment. In this case listen politely, and show your interest. You will
probably gain useful information in such conversation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Never question the veracity of any statement made in general
conversation. If you are certain a statement is false, and it is injurious to
another person, who may be absent, you may quietly and courteously inform the
speaker that he is mistaken, but if the falsehood is of no consequence, let it
pass. If a statement appears monstrous, but you do not know that it is false,
listen, but do not question its veracity. It may be true, though it strikes you
as improbable.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Never attempt to disparage an absent friend. It is the
height of meanness. If others admire her, and you do not, let them have their
opinion in peace; you will probably fail if you try to lower her in their
esteem, and gain for yourself the character of an ill-natured, envious person.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In conversing with foreigners, if they speak slightingly of
the manners of your country, do not retort rudely, or resentfully. If their
views are wrong, converse upon the subject, giving them frankly your views, but
never retaliate by telling them that some custom of their own country is worse.
A gentleman or lady of true refinement will always give your words candid
consideration, and admit that an American may possibly know the customs of her
country better than they do, and if your opponent is not well-bred, your rudeness
will not improve his manners. Let the conversation upon national subjects be
candid, and at the same time courteous, and leave him to think that the ladies
in America are well-bred, however much he may dislike some little national
peculiarity.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Avoid, at all times, mentioning subjects or incidents that
can in any way disgust your hearers. Many persons will enter into the details
of sicknesses which should be mentioned only when absolutely necessary, or
describe the most revolting scenes before a room full of people, or even at
table. Others speak of vermin, noxious plants, or instances of uncleanliness.
All such conversation or allusion is excessively ill-bred. It is not only
annoying, but absolutely sickening to some, and a truly lady-like person will
avoid all such topics.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I cannot too severely censure the habit of using sentences
which admit of a double meaning. It is not only ill-bred, but indelicate, and
no person of true refinement will ever do it. If you are so unfortunate as to
converse with one who uses such phrases, never by word, look, or sign show that
you understand any meaning beyond the plain, outspoken language.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Avoid always any discussion upon religious topics, unless
you are perfectly certain that your remarks cannot annoy or pain any one
present. If you are tête-à-tête with a friend, and such a discussion arise,
inquire your companion's church and mention your own, that you may yourself
avoid unpleasant remarks, and caution him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Never, when advancing an opinion, assert positively that a
thing "is so," but give your opinion as an opinion. Say, "I
think this is so," or "these are my views," but remember that
your companion may be better informed upon the subject under discussion, or,
where it is a mere matter of taste or feeling, do not expect that all the world
will feel exactly as you do.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Never repeat to a person with whom you converse, any
unpleasant speech you may have heard concerning her. If you can give her
pleasure by the repetition of a delicate compliment, or token of approval shown
by a mutual friend, tell her the pleasant speech or incident, but do not hurt
her feelings, or involve her in a quarrel by the repetition of ill-natured
remarks.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Amongst well-bred persons, every conversation is considered
in a measure confidential. A lady or gentleman tacitly confides in you when he
(or she) tells you an incident which may cause trouble if repeated, and you
violate a confidence as much in such a repetition, as if you were bound over to
secrecy. Remember this.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Never criticise a companion's dress, or indeed make any
remark whatever upon it. If a near friend, you may, if sincere, admire any
article, but with a mere acquaintance let it pass unnoticed. If, however, any
accident has happened to the dress, of which she is ignorant, tell her of it,
and assist her in repairing the mischief.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">To be able to converse really well, you must read much,
treasure in your memory the pearls of what you read; you must have a quick
comprehension, observe passing events, and listen attentively whenever there is
any opportunity of acquiring knowledge. A quick tact is necessary, too, in
conversation. To converse with an entirely uneducated person upon literature,
interlarding your remarks with quotations, is ill-bred. It places them in an
awkward situation, and does not add to your popularity. In conversing with
persons of refinement and intelligence, do not endeavour to attract their
admiration by pouring forth every item of your own information upon the subject
under consideration, but listen as well as talk, and modestly follow their
lead. I do not mean, to assent to any opinion they may advance, if you really
differ in your own tastes, but do not be too ready to show your superior
judgement or information. Avoid argument; it is not conversation, and frequently
leads to ill feeling. If you are unfortunately drawn into an argument, keep
your temper under perfect control, and if you find your adversary is getting
too warm, endeavour to introduce some other topic.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Avoid carefully any allusion to the age or personal defects
of your companion, or anyone who may be in the room, and be very careful in
your language when speaking of a stranger to another person. I have heard a
lady inquire of a gentleman, "who that frightful girl in blue could
be," and receive the information that the lady in question was the
gentleman's own sister.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Be careful, when travelling, not to wound the feelings of
your friends in another country or city, by underrating their native place, or
attempting to prove the superiority of your own home over theirs.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Very young girls are apt to suppose, from what they observe
in older ones, that there is some particular manner to be put on, in talking to
gentlemen, and, not knowing exactly what it is, they are embarrassed and
reserved; others observe certain airs and looks, used by their elders in this
intercourse, and try to imitate them, as a necessary part of company
behaviours, and, so become affected, and lose that first of charms, simplicity,
natural grace. To such, let me say, your companions are in error; it requires
no peculiar manner, nothing to be put on, in order to converse with gentlemen,
any more than with ladies; and the more pure and elevated your sentiments are,
and the better cultivated your intellect is, the easier will you find it to
converse pleasantly with all. One good rule can be always followed by young
ladies; to converse with a lady friend as if there were gentlemen present, and
to converse with a gentleman as if in the room with other ladies.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Avoid affectation; it is the sure test of a deceitful,
vulgar mind. The best cure is to try to have those virtues which you would
affect, and then they will appear naturally.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Full Content <a href="http://www.gutenberg.org/files/35123/35123-h/35123-h.htm#CHPTR_II">LINK</a></span></div>
<span style="text-align: justify;"><br /></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-85118404343779899402014-01-21T09:30:00.000+00:002014-01-25T22:18:29.883+00:00Have you asked your Dominant...<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The question is often asked, how can you tell a real
Dominant from a fake, how can you be sure this Dominant is the right Dominant
for you, and endless list of how do you know questions. By asking your potential Dominant these
questions, you may find yourself better able to answer your own questions and
understand His expectations of you.</span><br />
<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">How long have you been involved in the D/s lifestyle, and
what led you to this lifestyle in the first place?<br /><br />Do you have or plan to have a more than one
slave/submissive, on or offline?<br /><br />What sort of relationship are you looking for? (Online only, phone, real world, potential
marriage/permanent partner?)<br /><br />How much time are you willing to devote to training a new
sub, and how much of her time would you require in return? Would you have daily contact with your
submissive/slave?<br /><br />Do you indulge in these pleasures with women/men in
"real life"? If so, what precautions
for health and safety are involved? What
type of safety precautions do you feel are necessary for an online or phone
relationship?<br /><br />What sort of training/education have you had to be the
dominant member of this relationship?
Have you had experience training a submissive who is new to D/s? What made you decide this was for you?<br /><br />What are your basic philosophies with regard to D/s.<br /><br />What are your rules, contracts, agreements, etc.? What do you require of your slave and of
yourself?<br /><br />What sort of structured training do you prefer to use? What sorts of discipline/punishment for
infractions? What kinds of tasks do you
assign your save to perform for you?<br /><br />What are your deepest desires, pleasures, hopes for this
relationship? What, in your opinion,
does the Dom receive in return for His time, love and protective care over his
sub?<br /><br />Do you have any references available that I might contact?</span></blockquote>
<br />
<a href="http://www.asubmissivesjourney.com/subbie2.html">Original Shared from: </a><br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-67552507808110332072014-01-20T16:44:00.000+00:002014-01-25T22:18:41.033+00:00The Main Types of Submission in BDSM: Submissive, Slave and Pet<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><u>slave VS sub</u></b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In the BDSM lifestyle there are largely three different
types of submissives, and when speaking to them, they will tell you with pride
which they are and why. I will give you here some description of those types
but before I do so I would like to make clear something regarding my BDSM
World. Most will say a slave in comparison to a sub is mostly a female without
opinion, she is only to do as her Master desires and in some cases without
limits. I argue there is anyone without opinion, desires and much more I do not
accept any reference to NO limits. In my way of thinking, limits are always
present and even more, a Master’s limits are actually defined by His slave/sub
limits but this is a concept I will analyse in some other post of mine. Keep in
mind that though i usually like to mention my girl as a slave I am well aware
that a slave goes with a Master when a sub goes with a Dom.</span><br />
<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I provide you with two different copies that i find really
interesting and in () i include my own personal comments<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u style="font-weight: bold;">Submissive (sub</u>) – <u style="font-weight: bold;"> </u>As a sub you submit to your Dom, you give
up control for long periods of time. However you have your opinions and your
choices and you can still make them. Say you do the dishes and pay the bills,
these things usually are still under your control. It changes only during set
times and parameters. There is also the thought of the “power balance” between
dominant and submissive. Meaning that in a submissive role although you give up
the control the power is really still 50/50 just in a different setting and
under more intense circumstances. Sex is usually a large part of this
relationship and mostly where the submission enters in. Now don’t get me wrong
the intensity is still strong and the punishments and pain are real and
overwhelming however you have more of an option to stop and this doesn’t spill
over into the everyday that much.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><u>Slave </u></b>– As a slave control is given up completely. The power
balance is completely tipped in the Dominants direction. However keep in mind
this is a choice the slave makes not something she/he was made to do. Slaves
usually are slaves 24/7 (as I explained personally I do not believe there is
part-time or 24/7. Those in BDSM lifestyle are always part of this as it is a
way of life, a way of philosophy and not something we take a break out of it.
Of course, if one anticipates BDSM as it appears on porn movies, then is hard
to understand what i am talking about). They may work but when they get home
there is no distinction from normal day to a BDSM day, that person is always a
slave from the day they ask for that. As a slave sex is still very real and
alive however not always the goal and not needed for the Dominant and slave to
be in that persona. As a slave the lifestyle is usually (I disagree on that
“usually” and i would say the word might fit better) more intense in pain,
humiliation and just pure pleasure (It is always about pleasure. Even when it
does not involve any sexual act pleasure to serve and pleasure to control is
there. I would say instead that in a Master/slave relationship is easier to
explore the darker desires of our soul. Talk, accept, admit, explore and find
out more about fetishes and needs that usually most people are afraid to even
speak off) . Something to remember however is that as a slave this does not
mean if the Dominant asks you to break the law or hurt yourself that you should
obey on a whim. If a Dominant is asking you to do things that are against the
law or against your moral values than he or she is not a true dominant.
(additionally how far the Master will go, how much He will push his slave’s
limits and what practices He will use are pre-discussed, agreed and in event no
matter how confident the slave is a safe word should be agreed for any
situation the slave would like to stop what is going on. The more a Master and
a slave are honest and open with each other the better it is to understand each
others needs and what should they do at time. Honesty, communication and trust
are essential and clearly time in order to progress and enjoy more such a
relationship).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">(This last one is something should not be practised by the
unexperienced, never for long periods of time and it has nothing to do with
puppy play or other similar sexual fetishes.)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><u>Pet</u></b> – This hasn’t always been a classification of a
submissive person and is still controversial in some circles. A pet is more on
the side of a slave except for one large difference, sex does not have to be
involved. In many cases it is not. If you have become a pet it is to give up
yourself and obey, you gain pleasure from the control and the obeying not from
sexual play. There can be play but it is rare in this kind of lifestyle. This
submission is one of the most dangerous because you can lose yourself mentally
because you so rarely have thoughts of your own, you usually do not work and
although you may discuss things with your Dominant he is last say in all
things.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Ultimately the deeper you go into submission the stronger
you have to be which of course is peculiar since you have to give up more of your
control with each level. But you have to be very sure of yourself to give up
every ounce of control and thought. Taking each step is serious and should
never be taken light by the Dominant and submissive, especially if you want to
remain safe, sane, and consensual.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Another comparison (from the blog of the Dungeon
Master) between a slave and a submissive
is the following<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><u>slave </u></b>(BDSM) — is a term often used in BDSM to connote a
specific form of submissive. A sexual roleplay or consensual slave could also
be a masochist or bottom, but this is not always the case. Connotatively it
refers to highly committed domination and submission (commonly abbreviated as
D/s) relationships, as a person who has surrendered their personal property and
freedoms to another, who has become the property or chattel of their owner(s).
This term is widely used, as it has a certain self-affirming weight. Some
practitioners feel the difference between submissive and slave is the degree of
submission. However, many who are involved in Master/slave relationships see
the difference as one in kind, not in degree. In particular, some slaves do not
have a naturally submissive personality, but simply choose to surrender their
will and volition to another (The are more than a few of examples of
individuals who are in a decision maker position at their professional life but
once they get back home they just put on their collar and surrender their will)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It should be noted that the Owner/slave relationship is
entered into on a strictly consensual basis, without the legal force of
historical or modern non-consensual slavery. It is also worth mentioning that
the laws of all countries (for example the Thirteenth Amendment to the United
States Constitution) strictly forbid the practice of slavery.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Various forms of symbolism are sometimes used to affirm the
Owner/slave relationship, such as wearing the owner’s collar, being registered
in a slave register, adopting (sometimes legally changing to) a name chosen by
the owner, or engaging in a public declaration or ritualized ceremony of some
type. Some people draw up a slave contract that defines the relationship in
explicit detail, but these have no legal weight and are therefore not intended
to be used in any court of law.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In some traditional rituals, after signing a slave contract,
many people celebrate the commitment to the relationship with a collaring
ceremony, which can be simple or elaborate and friends are usually invited. The
slave then wears a collar, which symbolizes their status. The collar may be an
actual piece of neckwear, or may be a bracelet or other piece of jewellery that
symbolizes their slavery. These collars are generally never removed unless or
until the relationship is dissolved, although some slaves exchange a formal
collar for a more subdued (or less obtrusive) one in work and vanilla
situations.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There is considerable debate over the exact definition of
the word “slave” as it pertains to BDSM. Many people believe that you are a
slave if you consider yourself one, whilst others believe one must be in the
emotional state of Total Power Exchange or Internal Enslavement for the term to
apply.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There are differences of opinion about whether one needs to
be currently owned to be identified as a slave. Many in the Master/slave
community do not feel that ownership is a requirement.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><u>submission/submissive (BDSM)</u></b> — (also known as D&s, Ds or
D/s) is a set of behaviours, customs and rituals relating to the giving and
accepting of dominance of one individual over another in an erotic or lifestyle
context. D/s is often referred to as the “mental” side of BDSM. Physical
contact is not a necessity, and can even be conducted anonymously over
telephone, email or (more recently) instant messaging services. In other cases
it can be intensely physical, sometimes traversing into sadomasochism. In D/s,
one takes pleasure or erotic enjoyment out of either dominating or being
dominated. Those who take the superior position are called Dominants, Doms
(male) or Dommes (female), while those who take the subordinate position are
called subs or submissives (male or female). </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A switch is an individual who
plays in either role (I would accept the term switch only for those who see BDSM
as a sexual play not a real lifestyle. As explained before in my opinion there
are no switches as sooner or later the one side will prevail over the other).
Two switches together may negotiate and exchange roles several times in a
session. Submissives generally outnumber Dominants, with male subs outnumbering
Dommes by the widest margin, often three to one or more. “Dominatrix” is a term
usually reserved for a female professional dominant who dominates others for
pay.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="http://dominationsubmission.wordpress.com/2012/12/20/the-main-types-of-submission-in-bdsm-submissive-slave-and-pet/"><b>originally shared: </b></a></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-60721825317739569802014-01-17T20:00:00.000+00:002014-01-25T22:18:49.599+00:00What IS and IS NOT a Mentor<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i><u>WHAT A MENTOR IS NOT:<o:p></o:p></u></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">1) Infallible...we are human<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">2) a Teacher or Guardian...we can only advise<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">3) Your Master, we can not tell you not to communicate or
not to do something. Only you can decide.</span><br />
<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">4) Reference checker, only you should do that, only you know
what you risk. We can show you how, but after that it is up to you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">5) Responsible for you...only you are responsible for your
safety and decisions, once you have a Master then they become responsible as
well, but you are your first guardian.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><u>WHAT A MENTOR IS:<o:p></o:p></u></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">1) A listening ear, and a shoulder<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">2) Someone who can show you how to research, and learn
safely. They can point out pitfalls but you will always find your own.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">3) A caring friend.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">4) Someone with their own experience who is willing to share
that with you...not control or direct you by it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">5) Someone who can introduce you to a strange new world for
you to explore...but who can not explore it for you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Most of all a Mentor is there when you make those first
steps with a new Dom, or new steps with an old one...ready to listen...and
watch you take wing.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02324400186542139973noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4184486013323581763.post-32678434697626265662014-01-17T16:28:00.000+00:002014-01-25T22:18:57.748+00:00The Healthy Submissive<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Discipline gives total freedom; it allows you to go
beyond your limitations, to break through boundaries and reach the highest
goal. The path to discipline will not only save a person's life, it will also
give it meaning. How? By introducing him to deeper joys and deeper longings, by
creating a silence in which the whisper of the heart can be heard. Truly,
discipline is the road to liberation."</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">--Gurumayi Chidvilasananda</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In this discussion, I will be talking primarily about the
female heterosexual submissive, because I don't know enough about
non-heterosexual female submissives and Dominants to know whether this analysis
is completely applicable. This focus is not to suggest that lesbian female
submissives and their challenges are less worthy of study, merely that I am not
equipped at this time to do such a study. So often, women who are newly aware
of their submissive needs endure a period of self doubt around the troubling
question: am I sick? I've seen women read the psychiatric diagnostic manual
(DSM-IV) and then ask, "do I have borderline personality disorder?"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I am writing here not ONLY about the sexual aspects:
"am I sick because I get turned on by images of being taken, used, forced,
swept away by masculine energy more powerful than my own?"; I am also
writing about the nonsexual aspects of being submissive: "am I sick
because I yearn to depend on, and follow the lead of, a man stronger than
myself?"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I will attempt to address both aspects in this essay.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></div>
<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What precisely fuels this kind of question, "am I
sick?" Why would a woman discovering the language of her nature think she
has a mental disorder? Or at the very least, have something very wrong with
her?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A submissive discovers, or more properly, realizes and
acknowledges that she functions AT HER BEST in relation to another. And the
more intimate, holding, containing that relationship, the better she feels and
the better she performs in cardinal areas of adult life: work, friendships, and
parenting. Realizing she is at her best in such relation makes her wonder why
she can't do it for herself? Why does she need such a relationship to
accomplish what she should be able to do for herself?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In thinking about this, I have come to question the cultural
determinants of what is considered the highest good. Here in Western society,
we place highest value on independence, on "pull yourself up by the
bootstraps", on the lone pioneer, the trailblazer, the less needy and more
self sufficient. We value competition over cooperation, tangible achievement
over achievement in relationship. We pay big bucks to men (and the few women)
who run big corporations, and less to the nursery school teachers, the nurses,
the secretaries, the social workers, the caregivers rather than the producers.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There is something wrong with believing that such
independence is the only good. It is especially wrong for the most
relatedness-oriented among us, the submissive female.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Part of the newly aware submissive's task is to separate out
the internalized voices of her culture: those voices that tell her she is too
needy, too dependent, too focused on the others in her life. Once she can
articulate what those voices tell her, she can begin to question not HERSELF,
but the validity of those internalized values, using her own yardstick to
measure her life, rather than our culture's standard.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We can see how perspective is critical in understanding a
phenomenon. In a study of moral development in children, for example, Dr.
Robert Coles, in a study of moral development in children, researched how
children decide what is good and right. To do this, he presented several
scenarios describing a moral or ethical dilemma, presented the scenario to
school age children, and analyzed the results. The description of the study
here is to illustrate the nature of cultural bias and it's impact on
individuals.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">One of Dr. Cole's scenarios was as follows: <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A man has a very, very sick wife, so sick she could die if
she doesn't get a particular, very expensive medicine. The man doesn't have the
money for the medicine, so in desperation he steals it from a pharmacy. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The children are asked questions about this scenario. Coles
found that boys tended to conclude that the man should be punished, because the
law is the law, and nobody should break the law. Coles saw this as a higher
order of moral reasoning, reflecting the statement, "a nation of laws, not
of men." That is, that nobody is above the law, and the rule of law is not
situationally defined. The boys applied an abstract universal principle to a
singular instance. Coles understood this ability to transcend the personal as a
"more evolved" form of moral development.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The girls were deeply troubled by the scenario, and most of
them sought ways to solve the man's problem within the context of relatedness:
they wondered if the man could ask the pharmacist for the medicine, and offer
to work for him to pay for it, or pay him back later. They wondered if the man
had friends who could help him pay for the medicine, and they believed he
shouldn't be punished for his act of desperation. Their sense of right was
situational, and defined within the context of relatedness. They did not come
to articulate an abstract universal principle, but sought to solve the problem
within the context presented. Coles saw this as a less logical, lower order of
moral development because the girls could not emotionally distance themselves
from the central human drama in the scenario.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">After Coles' work was published a woman named Carol Gilligan
reviewed the studies that Cole had done and reanalyzed them, in a book called,
"In a Different Voice." Rather than seeing the boys' responses as evidence
of "higher" development and the girls' as "lower" she
redefined them as different. And she pointed out that the girls responses, so
firmly rooted in human context and relatedness were devalued by a society in
which the typically masculine is of more cultural worth than the typically
feminine. She asked, "why is it considered a 'higher' order of moral
development to value universal principle over human context?" and in so
doing highlighted the sexism inherent in the analysis.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As we can see, this type of analysis is extremely useful in
understanding typical submissive conflicts. We tend to ask the wrong questions:
"am I bad, sick, weak?", when we should be asking, "is there
something missing from the yardstick I use to measure myself?" <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If one looks at capacity for relatedness as a strength, as a
good, then it becomes clear that the submissive has a talent for this, for
relatedness. And that seeking a partner who can meet her need for this
relatedness is a good thing, a healthy thing. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If we begin our analysis without the cultural assumptions
about what is of "higher" value, we can begin to understand that it
is possible for a woman to be submissive, and to be healthy. And we can try to
imagine what a healthy submissive functions like, and how she developed her
adult personality. Let's start backwards, and ask ourselves, what might a
healthy adult submissive woman "look" like, psychologically speaking:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">1. The healthy submissive is capable of, and thrives on,
intense, intimate, emotionally open relationships. This is often evident in the
number of nourishing, sustaining, and life affirming friendships she makes over
the years. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">2. The healthy submissive is a giver. She often needs help
to ration herself because her impulses nearly always lead her to want to do
good for others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">3. The healthy submissive is capable of intense joy,
especially in the context of a sustaining relationship.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">4. The healthy submissive finds significant relaxation when
properly related. She is at ease in that place.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">5. The healthy submissive has finely tuned interpersonal
sensitivity. She is reactive to subtle shifts in the emotional tone of others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6. The healthy submissive has a fluidity of self, a
flexibility that enables her to adapt to changing circumstances.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7. The healthy submissive is playful.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8. The healthy submissive has no more than the usual
cultural conflicts about her body, and its goodness and beauty. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9. The healthy submissive takes pride in her
accomplishments. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">10. The healthy submissive accepts herself as she is,
knowing that while her culture values independence and self sufficiency, she
has strong dependency needs and that there is no inherent "wrongness"
about those needs. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">11. The healthy submissive seeks nourishing relationships. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">12. The healthy submissive, in accepting herself "as
is" is tolerant of others. But neither will she allow anyone to tell her
what her truth should be. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">13. The healthy submissive has a reasonable self concept,
aware of her difficulties as well as her strengths. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">14. The healthy submissive hunger is to be the object of an
intense and penetrating understanding. When her nature is understood and she is
held in a loving and firm frame, her devotion is almost limitless. The healthy submissive
has an enormous capacity for devotion, from which springs her service. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What makes a woman a submissive?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As with all conjectures about human development, the answer
is likely two-fold: a combination of nature and nurture, biology and environment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There is a whole body of literature that makes observations
about temperament. This literature talks about the variations in behavior in
infancy as a manifestation of temperament: the expression of regularity,
responsiveness, and reactivity. In the area of regularity, some infants are
regular and predictable from the get-go: they sleep regularly, wake at
predictable intervals to nurse, and have predictable periods of alertness in
which they begin the earliest socialization. Some infants are irregular: they
will one day sleep for an 8 hour stretch, then be awake all night, the next day
they will sleep for one hour intervals through a 24 hour period. In the area of
responsiveness, some infants will find novelty and intense stimulation
aversive, and will withdraw or become irritable when presented with those; some
infants are stimulated to engage and explore novelty and intense stimulation.
Some infants have high thresholds for sensation, requiring a relatively intense
stimulus to become aversive, some have low thresholds, and respond to mild
stimulation. Some infants will for example, be intensely distressed by a wet
diaper; some will not register discomfort until diaper rash sets in. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The sum total of these innate, biologically founded
responses make up temperment. It is easy to see what people mean by an
"easy" baby: one who sleeps, eats, and eliminates regularly and
predictably; one who has a moderate response to stimulation, neither
withdrawing nor reacting intensely; one who is drawn easily into social
exchanges, and provides pleasurable reinforcement of socialization with their
caregivers, one who is easily "read" and easily comforted, one who
accepts change without undue distress.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I think one of the traits in this biologically grounded
array that makes up temperament is common to all submissives. And that is
social responsiveness. I would suggest that the baby who is temperamentally
"set" to register and respond selectively and sensitively to social
cues has the seeds of submissiveness in her nature. This is the baby that will
search the environment for a human face; who will be attuned to, and very
responsive to the human voice; who will preferentially and selectively attend
to, and process, human interaction.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This baby, as she grows into childhood, will be easy to
control, to shape, especially if she is temperamentally on the "easy"
side. This little girl will be exquisitely sensitive to criticism and
correction, to disapproval, to praise. Rather than requiring a raised voice to
correct, a raised eyebrow will often do. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Even further, this little girl will be exquisitely sensitive
to nuance: she will know when others are angry, hurt, sad, bewildered even when
they are not spoken about. She has a "sixth sense" about people.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As children do, she requires the adults in her life to
validate her perceptions when appropriate. Let's say her parents are troubled
by a financial stress, and like good, responsible parents seek to shield her
from their stress. The child will pick up on the unspoken tension, sensitive as
she is to subtleties of body language, voice pitch, facial expression. She
might inquire of her parents what is wrong, and be told "nothing is wrong,
honey... go and play." This leaves the child confused: she knows in that
way that she knows, that something is wrong. But her perceptions are not
validated. She is told nothing is wrong. But her parents, who are not at their
best, may be a little short with her, and picking THAT up too, she goes off to
play concluding that she must have done something wrong, to be sent away. Part
of this is the megalomania of childhood, part of this is a reasonable and
logical synthesis of resolving the child's felt sense of things with what she
is told.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This kind of interaction, repeated over the years, in the
BEST and most loving of families, leads to an adult personality in which there
is some anxiety associated with relatedness. The submissive female learns to
scan the social environment for signs of trouble, seeks to "fix" the
trouble, and all too often, believes herself to be the cause of the trouble. If
someone important is tired, the submissive has exhausted them. If someone
important is angry, the submissive must have angered them. If someone important
is disappointed, the submissive must have failed them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This trait, this interpersonal sensitivity in its highest
expression is when the submissive accurately registers interpersonal nuance,
and responds to it with a minimum of self-referral, recognizing that other's
emotional states may have nothing to do with the submissive herself. This is
how it works for the healthy submissive, who as an adult, often finds great
fulfillment working in fields such as social work, nursing, medicine,
counseling, teaching.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There are certain vulnerabilities a child constituted with a
submissive nature faces. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Because of her intense awareness of interpersonal nuance,
she is highly sensitive to both criticism and praise. When criticized, she is
likely to feel intense shame; when praised, intense pleasure. Since the shame
feels so bad, and the praise so pleasurable, she becomes a people-pleaser. This
tends to lead to the development of what psychologists call "an external
locus of control." Meaning that child bases her self assessment (am I good
or bad?) on factors outside herself. The female submissive defines herself
based on what others tell her she is.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Parents have enormous responsibility with such an
influenceable child. Nascent talents can either be nurtured or aborted with
just a word. This child will likely live up, or down to, whatever is expected
of her. Expect more than she can constitutionally do (like academic, athletic,
or social success) and she will develop an intense sense of inferiority. Praise
her out of proportion to her talents (this is the BEST drawing any child EVER
did) and she will develop an inflated sense of self. Accurately and sensitively
validate her real abilities and talents, and she will seek goals appropriate to
her ability, and take pleasure in achieving them. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When the environment is reality based, sensitive, and
balanced, the child grows up embracing her special ability to be
"related" to others, to be sensitive, and has a sense of self in
reasonable tune with her true abilities and vulnerabilities, neither
excessively self effacing or self aggrandizing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But if development should go awry, as it too often does for
this child, the personality traits she has develop in a distorted manner, and
cause her difficulties. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In dysfunctional families, this child suffers more than
others with tougher hides, less reactive temperaments. She is often the one
singled out for physical, sexual or emotional abuse. Her very nature makes her
available for use: for the parent's angers, frustrations, sexual impulses, or
narcissistic gratification. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When a submissive child is misused in this fashion, she is
unable to utilize her interpersonal talents in a constructive way. She must
either develop rigid defenses that constrain her ability to be flexible as an
adult, or be blown about by the winds of other's emotions all her life, or
become stuck in what are popularly called, "co-dependent
relationships."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Women who emerge from childhood with these traits will be
more or less consciously submissive in that they are STILL moldable,
controllable by others. Those who don't consciously seek a Dominant partner
will naturally gravitate to a man who influences, controls her in a benevolent
manner. Who accepts her, loves her, nurtures her, and values her sensitivity.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Those who consciously seek a Dominant partner are those who
are perhaps, so sensitive that they require not only benevolence, but someone
who understands PRECISELY how moldable and influenceable they are, and is
capable of using the power to mold her and influence her deliberately and
consciously, for her good and the good of the relationship.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In that kind of relationship, the submissive is freed to be
all of herself. She is safe enough to feel her exquisitely sensitive reactions
to others, to play like a child, to give care and to take care, to be angry, to
lose shame. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There is a strength beyond measure in self knowledge and
acceptance. There is freedom in jettisoning shame, in letting go of
"shoulds." <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">To know oneself as a submissive woman, to accept that it is
neither the terrible thing that society tells us it is, nor the only right and
true way to be for OTHERS, is to be free. What is, is.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There are two kinds of strengths: the strength to lead, and
the strength to follow; the strength to control, and the strength to yield.
There are two kinds of power: the power to strip another's soul bare, and the
power to stand naked. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do not mistake following for weakness, for it is not. Do not
mistake yielding for weakness, for in yielding there is resilience. Do not
mistake the submissive's need for relatedness for inability to be alone. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Submissive women are not weaklings. They are sensitive
people who have a great deal of resilience in the face of their particular
challenges. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Submissiveness is a strength seeking a proper context.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Origonally shared by By <a href="http://www.asubmissivesjourney.com/healthy_submissive.html">Yalda Tovah</a></span></div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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